Howmanheyman

5live, Ronaldo not getting the service. Some quality in that Portuguese side but they're just trying to accommodate a static number seven up front.

"Neyal goes to sto-ak and Potter prefers Leicester? What the fuck is going on, eya, like?"

She was last seen getting rattled by Arthur. Arthur B Regis.

1st televised game of the season on Friday night, 8th placed Man United at home to 13th placed Fulham because.... Errr......well....... Theatre of dreams.....err.......Gaz Nev has something on that Saturday so..... Amazed they haven't put arsenal on but have Brentford v palace?

I once had a look from a mackem behind a police escort, it wasn't a hiding but I still get goosebumps thinking of my close encounter with death.

Who's Mrs Spock discussing the foul on the keeper? 'its a foul, Jim, but not as we know it.'

They get some stick, ITV, but they not only show the games but ALWAYS give you fantastic opportunities to win four tickets for the final of whatever tournament it is PLUS fifty thousand quid to spend and all you've got to do is phone an 0898 premium cost number! Honestly, man, just an amazing TV station. ❤️

I'm going to start a self help group called MHA, (Mag Hidings Anonymous), for all the poor Mags who've taken numerous hidings from MLFs after we committed numberless faux pas usually witnessed by neutral football fans who silently approved of the tough, hard justice meted out by the Pale Riders of the Durham Plains, the Massive fans of Lads. Anyone is free to join, just start off by introducing yourself to the group by saying, 'Hi guys, my name is [insert name here] and I've took one hell of a hiding from an MLF after setting my lip up' and the group will welcome you with open arms and see if we can all learn humility from the greatest set of fans in the world, Sunderland AFC.

"and here's your commentary team, Sam Matterface and Lee Dixon.'

This ITV eulogy of England last night by Gabriel Clarke. Fuuuck me. Nicholas Witchell even winced.

These commentators*, man. Just said it's a matter of time before Belgium score then not a minute later Slovakia score and it's 'fully deserved'. *Tyldsley and Andros Townsend

More Mag hidings. 😔

RTG Max Allegri Beyn brilliant for Juventus but at the end lewked a bit fed up and lewks like he needs a new challenge. Could he be up to a project of getting the lads back up? No pressure from the fans, pewa love from the fans and a chance to bey happy again? #imagine?

Fabregas. Look at the calibre of managers they've had the last few years some of whom they couldn't even keep without them fucking off to clubs like Stoke. Yet they persist in mentioning names like Fabregas, Potter, Lampard etc. honestly, some of them are borderline insane.

The state of this cunt, man. it's like a non binary fusion of Nadine dorries and de pfeffel Johnson.

Alexander burned Persepolis down in a drunken huff/argument after conquering it. Good job he's long dead if he had to watch some of Pard's greatest hits like the mackem defeats, the regular hammerings from the likes of Liverpool and Man United.

Is this England team/squad better than the sum of it's parts? If not then then that's on the management I'm afraid.

'Aw, mates, you're afraid of your own shadows.'

Shearer saying take the sting out of the game, they've done that since the 35th minute.

I couldn't give a fuck about England and even I'm getting frustrated. Southgate holds England back, he's great at calming the players and has done a really steady job but he's not a top manager and never has been.

They've been pinching England fans flags and posting about it. (Obviously they wouldn't have went anywhere near any MLFs, just the likes of Charlton fans etc).

Obviously action man isn't fat enough or glakey enough to partake in the chair chucking in a foreign land in real life.