Howmanheyman

The best apple geniuses are the ones who don't bother buying apple phones.

Geoff Hurst going over and above for his daily bread. Employee of the month for you, sir! 🥇

Similar vibes to the RTG lads 'reminiscing' about the mag hidings they gave/give out to Walter Softy mags.

He only had to say two words but it was the timing of them and the context as his mate, Han Solo was about to get carbonated. 'oh no'

Not new but just a reminder of Laura's 'every little helps' journalism.

Bernard Breslaw as Chewbacca tipped me over the edge,

I was giggling just at the music then the voices started.

Think of the slow, dreary drone of the NW coronation street dirge, then match it up the dreary, commentary from NW natives, Michael Owen..... Danny Murphy...... Lee Dixon and of course, the exciting Mark Lawrenson. It all makes sense now.

Yesterday we're apparently in for DCL and selling Minteh to them. Today.... It's so transparent. Didn't see much about hotel sales?

Awww, it's quite cute how much they're smiling at Nigel. I say cute, I mean pathetic and a bit depressing.

I said Parthenon didn't I? (Rhetorical question, I wondered, went back a page, checked and altered). Mixing my Greek with Roman. For shame. 😔

I hope real news journalists watch these and are embarrassed.

"Mossad set those dates."

"Tread very carefully with the answer to this, mind. Very fucking carefully Indeed."

"Weeeell sometimes you do, but only a few of them and usually people who have unbelievably shit crack and anecdotes and who think they're terribly clever whilst working on talksport. Shall I mention that time I sent dickpics to females when under the influence? No, that'll not be grand."

I hope we've got a very good sell on clause which we should have if we're in a better position to bargain than Everton.

Don't worry, there'll be a robot version soon so you can dispense with the human wife.

Happy anniversary and hope things can settle down, I'm also worrying about parents etc and it's a shit part of getting to our age. No it's literally ten minutes walk from my door if I take a shortcut, it's in Walkergate.

Btw, 21st century tunes you like to hear, I'll say Moloko and 'sing it back'. Catchy as fuck and still sounds current.

What a lush few days, sitting in the garden enjoying the week off before I start (another) new job*. Could've started today but it's our anniversary today and meant to be nice all week so I negotiated a start next Monday instead. Had a look around the place and hard to judge what it'll be like but I couldn't have asked for a better location or work hours, the holidays are 'normal' (for me) and not the shit UK statutory allocation however for the first year I'm on minimum wage (it won't rise too much after that) and the wife is applying for universal credit to top us up, (she could've been claiming this for about twelve years, it wouldn't have gave us much extra at my old place but it would've paid her national insurance contributions which is why we looked into it and found out about it). I never see the rags/govt going on about benefits not claimed but she also saved the government thousands by not claiming DLA years after she could've as well. Anyway, I've made sweets to make people fat, made beer to make people drunk and fat so will be now making implements and aids to help people walk or save them from discomfort so I'm making amends for my previous wicked occupations. (If anyone has any halo's lying around, prepare to crown me now). * If anyone fancies a flutter, see Rishi's Conservative Bets LTD for the best odds of how long I'll stay? (But remember folks, please gamble responsibly).