Holden McGroin

Not sure who it was but someone on here said the best thing to happen to Joey Barton was Andy Carroll. Great line and absolutely true. Barton will be back to average now. Just watch. We built a team around him and now we're back to square one. Shola being injured is catastrophic (never thought i'd say that). We are Tiote and (say) nolan injuries away from relegation now - imo.

Oh fuck right off. You're going on ignore. I would as well but I like his crack in the cooking threads.

Are the lineups out yet?

So many similarities. All he needs is a hoose at Heddon on The Wall, and 200 pigeons and he's got the full set. I do think Big Dunc is a wank, AC is docile but not nasty, what Big Dunc said about Mowbray's wife is one of the biggest disgraces I've ever heard of in football. What did he say? See Mowbray's wife died of cancer he was the club captain of Celtic, all the OF players were at some awards ceremony not long after she died in Glasgow. Big Dunc won some award and made an official speech, and at the end he said (having a poke at Celtic not lifting any trophies again) "so the only thing Tony will have lifted this year is his wifes coffin". That wouldn't even be allowed in the Bad Taste Joke thread.

Tough game tonight. Could go either way. I reckon Fulham are quite a good team though and are probably in a false position.

Carroll is not Shearer and never will be. I'd say also he's been quite average in half the games he's played this season, it's not like he's been this unstoppable force in every game. Shearer hardly was either. In fact he was quiet in a lot of games but was always good for a goal.

So many similarities. All he needs is a hoose at Heddon on The Wall, and 200 pigeons and he's got the full set. I do think Big Dunc is a wank, AC is docile but not nasty, what Big Dunc said about Mowbray's wife is one of the biggest disgraces I've ever heard of in football. What did he say?

We'd all have to leave the country if that hit the UK. Interesting what would happen to the infrastructure if it did.

Then hit the gym first thing in the morning?

I thought Pardew was after a striker so he must have had some targets in his mind and been negotiating all transfer window. Jan 1st. Pardoo : "How much for Elmander?" Bolton: "Contract is up in the summer so £3m" Pardoo: "We dont have the money for that" To stumble into a last minute bid for Zoggy was an absolute joke.

Is that about Kenny Powers? Watched it a year or so ago.

Im a reet shit mood today. No idea why. Classic case of getting out on the wrong side of the bed.

Watch them try to claim some of the "fees and wages" went on Jose and Barton when they renew their contracts. Spineless cunts.

Time for Shola The Goala to step up take his crown as the new Prince of the Toon. In all seriousness he has played really well the past 1.5 seasons when fully fit. 26 starts -18 goals Even if you count appearances its still pretty good. 41 apps - 18 goals. You cant really argue with that.

They were basically asking him to forfeit well in excess of £10m so he could waste the next five years of his career at a going-nowhere cowboy outfit. They might be able to exploit the supporters loyalty but Carroll is a professional footballer and quite rightly wasn’t prepared to be a mug. Good point well made.

Lovenkrands might not be the greatest at getting involved in play but he does make good runs and can finish much better than Ranger.

He seems to be making his money back now and when recovers it all I hope he sells the club at reasonable price and never darkens us with his massive shadow ever again. Still not a profitable business, outside of once in a generation deals like this. We can't make another Andy Carroll to balance the books next year. True. He could just sell 3 of our best players instead every year though.

I think this is a key point actually. I've felt for the past two seasons that AC was very much part of this team spirit (along with Nolan and Barton) and I worry that this could seriously damage that now. You never know though. I thought it would be broken after Hughton was dispatched.

He seems to be making his money back now and when recovers it all I hope he sells the club at reasonable price and never darkens us with his massive shadow ever again.

Seriously though, say a company offered you a massive pay increase but you'd rather stay at your job. Would you tell your current employers that you dont want to leave but this is an amazing offer. Can you get anywhere near the salary they are offering? I would.

When someone puts a £35m bid in for him. Big AC: ""Errrr dekka. Liverpool are going to offer me £100k a week. What do you say to that?" Dekka "Put a transfer request in and fuck off"

Shola is twice the player he is. Im not joking either.

The thing is. Even if we put £15m bids in you know the player is obviously quite good so when we offer him £20k pw he'll just tell Fatboy to fuck off.

I'd be surprised if we spent £10m.

A few injuries and we might well go into freefall. Imagine if Tiote, Enrique & Barton got long termers. Fucked.