smoggeordie

Winning at Villa but losing to Fulham?

This

Dropped ("rested") for Saturday according to the Journal, with Bassong and one of S.Taylor/Beye at CB.

Hull are down, there aint no doubt about it, said it was 4 months, but still no one seems to believe it's going to happen. 3/1 with Coral. It's begging to be betted on. Only one person has said Hull are down. I'm actually struggling to see them picking up any points like. Mackems and Smoggies in their next two games. Lose both and they're in the shit like, despite the fact they have a few points on us.

http://www.guardian.co.uk/sport/blog/2009/...ewcastle-united If like me you have read Malcolm Gladwell's book Blink, and like me you are easily influenced, you will have adopted a mentality whereby you make gung-ho, snap decisions on the basis of gut instinct. This, in a nutshell, is the philosophy espoused within the book – make knee-jerk choices like a barmy fat cat and never stop to reflect. Actually it's highly likely that I'm massively oversimplifying Gladwell's book, as I didn't bother to read all of it. I just read the first page, gleaned that it was about making gut decisions and then made the gut decision to stop reading it. I've never looked back. Since then I've been judging everything with the caffeinated velocity of a mouse's heartbeat. Options whiz by on the souped-up conveyer belt of my days – "Yes, I'll buy those trousers"; "I think I love you"; "I hate you, and I demand a refund for these unflattering lady's trousers". I couldn't be more prejudicial and ill-considered if I were to chisel out my lovely brain and replace it with Richard Littlejohn's secret agenda. I employed this half-baked thinking technique when watching Alan "the Geordie Pope" Shearer giving his inaugural press conference as Newcastle manager. Shearer was composed, confident, funny and sincere, so I instantly adjudged him to be a success. As I tuned in he was wise-cracking about his well-chosen assistant, Iain Dowie, a man who could shelter from a storm under his own eyebrow ridge. "He will be a fresh face," said Alan, "not a pretty face but a fresh one" – which seems like the kind of good-natured bonhomie that will be required to lift spirits at St James' Park. I suppose that predicting whether players will become good managers or not is one of the trickier aspects of armchair punditry. Not so long ago I confidently announced to an indifferent world that Roy Keane would elevate Sunderland to the status of footballing emperors who would Harlem Globetrot their way to Premier League glory. Within 48 hours he was walking those poor dogs of his who only see the light of day when Roy storms out of a job – his living room carpet must look like a dirty great Rorschach test. Shearer sat behind that ubiquitous press conference trellis table, all mighty, protecting the beleaguered Toon like King Kong with his dolly bird. Many managers have been exposed by that set-up. Steve McClaren never looked like he should be there when doing England press. I always thought he might leap to his feet and start serving drinks. Alex Ferguson has the bored authority of a 3am desk sergeant and that ninny from Hull, Phil Brown, looks like he's a tipsy new judge for Dancing On Ice. Shearer was edificial and authoritative at the media banquet, refusing to be drawn into controversy or hyperbole, sticking throughout to his mantra that he was there for eight games. In comedy, timing (and jokes) is everything – Shearer has chosen the perfect moment for his coronation. There are sufficient points available to garner salvation and to ignite a Geordie conga of goodwill and hysteria that will see him anointed full time. Like many of the decisions to have come out of this uniquely beloved club, this appointment could be regarded as emotionally motivated. But I think, in this instance, it will work out. Dennis Wise has moved on, which Shearer claimed was due to some unknowable horoscopic alignment rather than his willpower, and this will please the fans no end. Wise was always regarded as a Cockney interloper, ballsing things up from within and reeking of jellied eels and John Fashanu's cologne. Perhaps this was unfair but his exit makes the return of Joe Kinnear even more unlikely. Even though Shearer has said he'll be there for "eight games" and that Kinnear will return as manager when he's fit, it's difficult to envisage a situation where Newcastle avoid relegation and after all the relief and celebration the people of Tyneside are informed that Shearer has gone and Kinnear will be returning. "OK. I know some of you were fond of Alan, in the sense of a blindly devoted love that will never, ever die. Well, he's gone. The good news is you can catch him Saturday nights on Match of The Day. Now be gentle with Joe, he's got a dodgy ticker." The gods of football like a good narrative. It was those gods who deigned that Andriy Shevchenko would score an equaliser for Ukraine at Wembley on Wednesday night against England. He struggled to score when playing in this country with Chelsea so how fitting that on returning to the emporium of English soccer he registered a strike. It was good for the story. It is Alan Shearer's destiny to succeed at Newcastle United – it's in his blood and it's in his accent and, like he did in the 90s, he will lead Newcastle to Shangri-La. It's obvious. I can tell from looking at him.

Last week I said Sunderland and Hull are going down, and of about 70 people who contributed and stated who's going down I was the only one who said Sunderland are going down, and the only one who said Hull are going down. It will happen. I said the mackems, like

If one/both of Bassong/Saylor fit: Harper, Beye, Coloccini, Bassong, Enrique, Raylor, Butt, Nolan, Jonas, Martins, Owen. If both Saylor and Bass out: Harper, Raylor, Beye, Coloccini, Enrqiue, Duff, Butt, Nolan, Jonas, Martins, Owen.

Obviously he is not as engaging as KK but how can you be so sure he is very aloof? I think he (sensibly) maintains a certain persona on tv but reckon he's actually a bit of a joker and a man's man. I don't think he'll quite get the players expressing themself to KK's level but he will probably inject more backbone, which is what we need for now. Had a mate went to do work at his home. Naturally he was extremely excited when Al (his hero) answered the door. High Alan, im from such and such and Ive come to..... Its Mr Shearer, not Alan came the reply. He was gutted. You're about the 5th person i've heard that story from. So either you all share the same mates (unlikely), or it's a load of shite. I've met the man on numerous occasions and he's always seemed like a top bloke.

Went to Peterborough vs Leicester last Saturday Malta vs Turkey Blyth vs Kettering (in the Kettering 'end')

BA1333 13:35 LONDON HEATHROW CHECK-IN 20-22 PROCEED

Any other team and i'd say Keegan 433 style. I just think Chelsea have too much in the centre of the park to leave our midfield so exposed. I agree with 442, with Nolan and Guthrie playing IMO.

Bring on the new messiah...

They've got a section with April fools in in the gossip column today, mixed in with some real stories. England coach Fabio Capello says Sir Alex Ferguson told him he felt "crazy" after paying £27m for Wayne Rooney from Everton in 2004. (Daily Express) Capello also requested that the badge on the new England shirt be put higher than usual to avoid rubbing on players' nipples. (Daily Star) Tottenham will keep the fans close to the pitch at their proposed new 58,000-seater stadium to replicate the atmosphere of White Hart Lane. (The Sun) Liverpool defender Daniel Agger, a trained tattoo artist, says he will tattoo the whole team if they win the Premier League title. (The Sun) Sir Alan Sugar says he hopes England open up a commanding lead in the first half against Ukraine - so fans watching the game on television will turn over to The Apprentice on BBC1 at half-time. (Daily Mirror) US President Barack Obama will travel to Eastbourne Borough's Blue Square Premier game against Ebbsfleet on Saturday, in order to watch his cousin Achtog Laprifolo play for Borough. (Eastbourne official website) Port Vale are to change their name to Burslem Port Vale next season, and have unveiled a new badge suspiciously similar in outline to rivals Stoke's. (Port Vale official website) Several clubs have revealed new shirts today - such as York's one-off purple shirt to be worn at the FA Trophy final, Lewes's one-off green and black shirt to mark the announcement of the South Downs as a National Park, and Wigan's switch to red and white halves next season to reflect a kit worn in 1932. (Various) Bury are to raise some much-needed revenue by staging a Monster Truck racing weekend on their Gigg Lane pitch, where the trucks will go head-to-head with the groundsman's tractor. (Bury official website) Wolves chief executive Jez Moxey is in talks to star in the next series of Strictly Come Dancing, alongside Hungarian sensation Lora Pliof. (Wolves official website) Barnsley will pioneer a Football League initiative whereby their players and managers will wear microphones wired up to the Oakwell PA system as part of an anti-swearing campaign. (Barnsley official website) Accrington Stanley have offered former Premier League referee Jeff Winter the role of stadium development manager, after he recently criticised the facilities at their ground. (Accrington official website) Plymouth have unveiled a new club badge paying homage to their Scottish manager Paul Sturrock and their Japanese investors, as designed by French typographer Una Avrille. (Plymouth official website) And finally... injuries, suspensions and illness are causing several managers and coaches to come out of retirement for this weekend's games - including Swansea manager Roberto Martinez, Walsall assistant manager Martin O'Connor and Barnsley coach Kelham O'Hanlon. (Various)

If anything, my love for the club has grown. The appreciation of what we had under Keegan and Bobby really hits home in times like this. Knowing that we've challenged for the title and beaten the likes of Juventus and Barcelona, as well as dominating Inter in the San Siro are memories that we'll never forget, and clubs like the mackems and Spurs will never see in the next 100 years. It's times like this where our club needs us the most and where we'll see exactly how much the club means to people.

JOE Kinnear may not be able take charge of the Newcastle United team until the trip to Liverpool on May 2 as he continues his recovery from a triple heart bypass operation. Kinnear will have to undergo rigorous tests on April 6 to determine whether he is strong enough to come back to United’s training ground before the trip to Stoke City on April 11, and it is far from certain when he will be given the all-clear to return to work full time. The 62-year-old is desperate to get back to work as quickly as possible, but even if he passes those tests his comeback will have to be a gradual one. Kinnear has been as alarmed as anyone by the Magpies’ slide into the relegation zone, but there has been little the former Republic of Ireland international can do other than offer advice to beleaguered caretaker manager Chris Hughton. Although Newcastle have won just one of the seven games in which Hughton has been in charge of the team this season, the Magpies’ hierarchy have resisted the temptation to appoint another manager in Kinnear’s absence. That is a decision which has attracted criticism from fans who believe the club lacks strong leadership in the dressing room at the time they need it most. However, as keen as owner Mike Ashley and managing director Derek Llambias are for Kinnear to take control of the side again, they cannot, and will not, rush him because of the continuing concern about his health. As a result, it is looking increasingly likely that Kinnear’s involvement will be confined to the training ground and pre-match team talks rather than actual direction from the dug-out, at least until the trip to Anfield. “Joe is desperate to come back, but we have to be sensible with him,” said Llambias. “If anything, we are going to have to hold him back at times because he’s so enthusiastic. We can’t have him leaping around on the touchline. “The good news, though, is he’s looking good and is feeling a lot stronger. I’ve been to see him this week and he was back to his old self really. “He goes for a load of tests on April 6 which is the big one for him. As long as the results come back ok he will be back at the training ground for a couple of days before the Stoke game and we’ll take it from there. “That might have to be how we do it for the first three games when he is back at work, a few days at the training ground in the build up to the game and then a little involvement on the matchday itself. “We’ll have to wait and see, it will all depend on how he feels and what the doctors say to him after the tests. He’ll have everything he needs at his disposal though.” Kinnear has still not signed the two-year contract he was offered before Christmas and The Journal understands he will not make any decision about his long-term future until the end of the season. Even though the heart operation is thought to have been a success, Kinnear does not want to commit himself to anything long term at this stage and he wants to discuss the implications of moving permanently to Tyneside with his family before deciding whether to accept the extension. However, he is adamant he will be able to return to the training ground in the next couple of weeks and the club – as revealed by The Journal almost fortnight ago – have once again denied reports they are trying to appoint Terry Venables as an interim manager for the remainder of this campaign. Meanwhile, Damien Duff could be miss next week’s game against former club Chelsea after the Newcastle winger flew back to England yesterday with a hamstring strain which has ruled him out of the Republic of Ireland’s World Cup qualifier against Bulgaria. Duff, who has only just returned to the Newcastle side following a calf injury, had been due to train with the rest of the Ireland squad yesterday afternoon but instead boarded a flight to London for treatment after picking up a problem the previous day which is estimated will sideline him for eight to 10 days. Newcastle’s Kazenga LuaLua has joined Doncaster on a month’s loan. The 18-year-old, the younger brother of former Magpies striker Lomana, could make his debut against Watford on April 4.

Can't see that happening like. Unfortunately, they're more than half decent at home.

Looking at those fixtures, Hull HAVE to beat Pompey and Stoke imo for them to be ok.

...as well as Blackburn. If i'm honest, I think Stoke will be well clear of the bottom three come May.

WBA are gone now imo. Looking at the smoggies last 5 games, I'm struggling to see them getting out of it. With regards to us, we simply HAVE to win those 3 home games, plus probably pick up points at one or more of Stoke, Spurs or Villa. I wouldn't be against doing what we did at Chelsea in all honesty when we go to Spurs and Liverpool, flat back ten and hope for the draw. Seeing as we've failed to beat any of Sunderland, Hull, Blackburn, Wigan, West Ham, Stoke etc at home, i'm really struggling to see us pick up 9 more points at home. I'm going for WBA, Boro and us to go down The outside bet being the mackems, as I think their run in is a very tricky one. If only we hadn't gifted them 4 points.

Can anyone whip up a good wallpaper with this?

I look forward to nigh on 50K gates at WHL next season. Oh, wait, your ground isn't big enough. I know what I would be rather sitting in. An old school stadium that is sold out every game rather than a big stadium full of empty seats. I knew that would get a reaction. So predicatable Danny Boy. Sold out every home game? Yer havin a faakin giraffe?

I look forward to nigh on 50K gates at WHL next season. Oh, wait, your ground isn't big enough.

Shouldn't give them a single penny. Get a fucking job like everyone else.

If we go down, our away support will rise massivley imo.