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so wheezekeeze's idea of investigative journalism is to read the telegraph at 5pm on a sunday and then regurgitate a few hours later in the guardian? she should stick to pondering on bromances, the stupid, pig ugly mackem cunt.

Too easy. I can't bring myself to do it.

On that basis I'm going to have to go for a tight 1-1 win with Philippe Albert scoring six exquisite lobs.

The results from the past two games have been disappointing but we really should have won both games. We accumulated 35 shots and xG of 4 goals ffs. Not the manager’s fault that we couldn’t finish our dinner. I blame the thread starter

I thought it would be some low life like Fist to say it!

Just on my way back from Sorrento. A timely reminder of how much I love Italy and the bizarre near omnipresence of Tennent’s Super I had completely forgotten about the latter. I’ve googled it before and I’ve still never really found a proper explanation Anyway, ciao

This is the small mercies thread not the large tragedies thread.

aye. you keep kicking the can down the road richard till we've concocted project big picture, the european super league, fair market value rules..... nee fucker'll notice.

Feel like pua shit just want him back x

And how they’ve dictated a set of anti-competitive rules to come in to force to stop us catching them. Even the fucking rule brought in specifically aimed at Tindall because we got in the CL the previous year and the likes of Arteta (who can act like a massive cunt with impunity) couldn’t handle a bit of needle.

Shes posher than the fuckin queen that one

There’s a bigger story, not least by virtue of it being an actual story. I .e. the Premier League (due to the process being completely lacking in transparency) approving the deal (after previously delaying it seemingly indefinitely) purely on the say so of Qatar.

Charlie Windsor gets heckled in Australia, BBC news Sally Bundock reporting it, face like a slapped arse, very unimpressed which is different from gooey smile she has whenever she reports on a normal fluffy royal piece. It's chalk and cheese.

Nobody has found out that MBS was behind the takeov ... oh

Watching Chelsea‘s overly inflated squad does really make me angry. It’s ridiculous with them being allowed to sign a ridiculous amount of players while we had to sell Anderson to comply with the rules to make the competition “fair“.

Nobody got to say it to Stevie's face.

Steve Bruce never managed us in a derby.

I'm all for an opportunistic good signing, if there are multiple teams in for him in Jan then the value won't be there though and if there aren't we can sign him for less next summer. Given our lack of being able to put the ball in the next I think a productive right winger is even more of a need than it was in summer so I want us spending money there first.

That’s what confidence can do to a player. Shame that we did our very best to deflate the morale of our players with all those shenanigans during the summer and after.

It’s everywhere in Italy. It was in the fridge alongside the smoothies in a cafe I went to in Rome. Maybe they consider it a health tonic.

I am getting even angrier. At least we got Ostrakismos or whatever his name is for an overly inflated price in return for the Geordie Messi.

Ah, I blame Irvine Welsh then.

Johnson iirc threw out all dissenting conservatives who would not sign up to his hard Brexit, now Jenrick is doing the same with the ECHR (I recall this point has been made previously but now he has confirmed/doubled down on it). Would leave us in great company joining Belarus and Russia as the only European non-signatories to this convention. Can such a right wing party really be elected? I really hope not but admit I'm just not sure any more. Hopefully in 4 years Labour will have made soem improvements and injected some positivity. I think they will have personally.

As a connoisseur of shithousery, this takes it too far.. it’s one thing to waste time on the pitch, but a cunt’s trick to waste NHS time. Hope he never walks again now tbh.

This one is for our pals down the road, but it also holds true for anyone within a few metres of Denise S’s horses mouth.

When I worked up in Aberdeen one of the lads’ cars got totalled when he hit a deer. I said well at least you got some venison, he said no, it’s illegal to take it if you hit it, car behind you can take it though, not 100% sure if that’s true mind.

I never killed bambi's mother last night.

Dr Gloom never did a match thread for a derby.

Gloom doesn't get to many games

I'm so glad I manage to not watch sky's Saturday morning bilge. Thanks for being our eyes and ears, wykiki.

be interesting to see how this season pans out. I think it's a reasonable comparison ro make with robson in the early 00s, the 01/02 season robson finished 4th with 71 points, exactly the same as howe in 22/23. while it might seem on harsh to suggest robson's 3rd place finish with 69 points the following season was regression, I do think there was signs of a decline. howe last season retains a lot of leeway because of the injuries, but not completely mind in my opinion, because there was games where we were fucking woeful. by 03/04 under robson and despite what seemed a credible 5th place, we plummeted to 56 points, 15 below 2 seasons prior. I wouldn't like to be forced in to making any kind of substantial bet that this team on what I've witnessed this session will finish with 56 points, would you? arguably our 3 best players in isak, gordon and bruno all look well below the form we know they're capable of, why? are they pissed off we've failed to strengthen the first team in 2 windows, near enough a calender year. big 3 months coming up, and it's likely to start badly with games away to chelsea and home to arsenal, come the end of january if mitchell/the club haven't taken any significant steps to strengthening and reserving the decline in momentum, we'll be nowhere near 56 points next may. hope I'm wrong.

Aye, he sullied our turf for a couple of seasons before fucking off to join the Pistols- equally successful there. 😉

I’m not a massive fan of xG either but in this case it supports what I saw with my eyes. We created enough high value opportunities across both games to have won them nine times out of ten. The problem was our finishing, not the overall performances, which were better statistically than the games at the start of the season which we won. I’m less worried about how we’re approaching things than some of the bed wetters online. The main problem is Isak and Gordon are missing chances they took last season - and Jacob Murphy is seemingly our first choice RW when he really should be a squad rotation option. We’d all be asking questions if Krafth was our first choice CB. He’s a similar level to Murphy - an honest pro but you want to use him for cup games and injury crises. Murphy shouldn’t be starting this many games. That’s not on Howe

You forgot about the one from Des Hamilton, just to be sure.

Arsenal and Liverpool fans moaning injustice and inconsistency is fucking

Reece James ✅

Drury as Salah scores a penalty....

Fuck that, have you seen what they do to choirboys!!!!

I love the old Football Manager squad when they strike up, the indignant protests of the terminally entitled….anyway…. 1. Theres very likely moderate to large issues behind the scenes due to the frankly clumsy arrival of a new DoF 2. The squad is undoubtedly a bit stale with some players still involved who Rafa bought and who played in the championship 3. A lot of these and fringe players have the power of decent and relatively long term contracts meaning they’re hanging around like a bad smell 4. PSR has our financial hands tied tightly round our backs 5. Our best players aren’t for whatever reason playing at their best, mostly due to fitness issues as far as I can make out. Our best players are also, even when fully fit, prone to inconsistency. 6. In spite of all this, If we’d taken the chances we’d created in the games v Everton and Brighton we’d have won both and have been on 17 points level with Villa in fourth. Am sure that doesn’t console many on here because we didn’t win either, and the reasons we didn’t win are largely due to points 1-5. Am not sure whether this squad and manager are likely to get themselves out of this trough. We’re still owned by people with no track record in football ownership and after their frankly miraculous start they’re maybe wondering what their next move is now we’ve hit a bit of an impasse. I look at Villa, they’re owned by V sports group, who own a share in a number of clubs. They’ve fucked up a bit (appointing Gerrard and Smith eg) but they’re going great now. Bournemouth look a really well run club too, they’re owned by people with experience in running sports clubs too. Am not sure as it stands we can say NUFC are particularly well run and that’s from top to bottom. Do PiF know what is required? The sad loss of Darren Eales won’t help that either. In view of all that I think we’re right to be a bit concerned. There’s lots of issues and they’re unlikely to be all ironed out in January or possibly even next summer. The structure looks right on paper but it’s stopped working to the benefit of the team on the pitch. But, as I’ve said, we still did enough to win the last two games. So cheer up ya miserable fuckers 😜

We could have, but we'd have increased our PSR breach on PSR deadline day, instead of removing it, and we'd now be looking at a points deduction.

They were bound to get something right by the law of averages.