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Insane thread bump

This is the prompt, just so you understand the different sections: Write a rap in the style of the 80s group Wham about a man from Boldon called Christmas Tree. He is a taxi driver who watches the 10 minutes of free view porn at midnight when his wife and kids are in bed. He has many hobbies and is in a state of near constant anxiety about his favourite football team, Newcastle United. He also thinks people with lisps are gay. **Verse 1** Yo, here’s a tale from Boldon town, ‘Bout a guy named Christmas Tree, always down, Taxi driver cruisin' late at night, While his family's asleep, he's got a different light. **Chorus** Christmas Tree, living life in a rush, 10 minutes of freedom, in that midnight hush, Hobbies stacked high, like his dreams on a shelf, But in the back of his mind, it’s all about himself. **Verse 2** Newcastle’s his team, the stress on his mind, Every match day, he’s a nervous kind, Shouting at the screen, feeling that thrill, But anxiety’s the game, he can’t seem to kill. **Chorus** Christmas Tree, living life in a rush, 10 minutes of freedom, in that midnight hush, Hobbies stacked high, like his dreams on a shelf, But in the back of his mind, it’s all about himself. **Bridge** He laughs at the quirks, but he’s stuck in a groove, Thinking those with lisps just ain’t in the mood, But deep down he knows, it’s all in the game, Just a man on the edge, trying to stake his claim. **Outro** So here’s to Christmas Tree, keepin’ it real, Navigating life, with that taxi wheel, In Boldon’s bright nights, he’ll drive and he’ll dream, Just a working-class hero, caught in the stream.

Well done CT but in real life Mrs HMHM can't make dinner no more, I've never worked in the docks and you can't use a motability car for driving jobs. Apart from that....

Howman used to work on the docks Fucked off the boss, he's down on his luck It's tough, so tough Mrs H makes dinner each day Waiting for her man to bring home the her pay She says, "We've gotta hold on to what we've got It doesn't make a difference if we make it or not We got each other, and that's a lot for love We'll give it a shot" Whoa, we're half way there Oh-oh, livin' on a prayer Take CT's advice, we'll make it, I swear Oh-oh, picking up a fayre

Then beat Liverpool in the QF and Man City in the semi final and we're laughing*. *Obviously we wouldn't be laughing, we'd get Man U in the final and they'd play above themselves whilst Odysseus throws the ball in our goal after replacing Nick Pope who injured himself in the pre-game warm up. Osula would do his best standing in for the injured Gordon who was standing in for the injured Wilson who was standing in for the injured Isak but it wouldn't be enough.

My involvement in football has fallen off a cliff tbh, not sure if it’s my age or just lack of enjoyment. Tbf everything seems to matter more when you’re younger. I remember being a teenager, I was playing football everyday. Watching whatever football was on the tv, just loved it. Just turned 40, I maybe watch 2 full games a month now. Just other things I would rather spend my time on. I despise the modernisation of football, i.e idiots on YouTube who are factually know nowts, just making coin off other idiots who love the game. Sky sports news 24 hour rolling coverage that has nothing of value, the internet statisticians who can’t kick a ball straight but know the percentages of a cunt hair. Talksport lowest common denominator shite that appeals to morons, baiting calls and clicks. Presenters on the live match doing all of the above. That stuff is boring. What never changes is the feeling when your team beat a bigger team or smash a rival. It’s the reason lads in the crowd cheer a thumping tackle more than a world class pass. It’s what you feel rather than what you know.

Glad to see Dan Ashworth's "great Summer" has gone to shit. €150mil on De Ligt, Ugarte and Zirkzee and they all look dog shit

There's a thing we've applied for, on it's own it's not enough for normal living but we might just be able to get by. Expecting some bullshit from the DWP because they've tried it on once before when she moved from DLA to PIP, (that was a very testing SIX MONTHS till we won an independent appeal) and also just because we're a fucked up country with priorities all over the place. We'll get there, the mortgage is right down, I'll get a FT job if it gets crunch time but I've got leeway with some redundancy/bonus money still in the bank.

Just so I can laugh about myself; Ballad of the Discontented Man In a town where the shadows stretch long, Lived a man with a heart full of song. Each job he took felt like a chain, A fleeting chance, but all in vain. He donned his suit, tied his tie, But with every day, he'd sigh and cry. From office clerk to factory floor, He dreamed of more, but found it a bore. Oh, Newcastle United, his heart’s true pride, But the gates of St. James' are closed wide. With tickets scarce and dreams deferred, He’d watch from afar, each cheer unheard. “Just one match,” he’d whisper in prayer, “To see them play, to feel the air. But luck’s not kind, and fortune's blind, In every crowd, it’s hope he can't find.” Yet through his troubles, a flicker of light, “I may be down, but I’ll keep up the fight. At least I’m not stuck as an MLF, With nothing to dream of, just empty breath.” So he trudged on, with a weary grin, Knowing in time, he'd find joy within. For though the jobs came and went like a breeze, His love for the Magpies would never cease. And though life’s road may twist and bend, He clung to hope, his true friend. With every setback, he stood tall and proud, A loyal supporter, amidst the crowd. The prompt was.... A ballad about a man not happy with every new job he gets, he can't get in to see his long time football team, Newcastle United, he's down on his luck but at least he wasn't born a MLF.

Job's a good un.

If they have to buy land, announcing they're definitely moving will affect negotiations on price. It'll affect contract tendering for the different possible builds too. Patience.

Fayre

David Orenstein: Toonpack has had his vaccination Fabrizio Romano: Toonpack 'Here we go!' Spaniel Tits: Toonpack errrrm, like, well, errrrm what do you like think errrrrm like Tory Boy: Toonpack its a total failure of the NHS that they cannot deliver the vaccinations that I as a donator got millions for, it's disgusting the NHS exists for free man!

I was at that game of your avatar, everyone going mental and Budgie wants rip Hardyman's head off just before the ref sends the mackem off. Aitken just smiling at the 90th minute penalty save. Honestly, most of us were still celebrating in the roker end when the red card came out and didn't realise at first. You're right about it meaning more when you're younger. The only panties I drop now is any that fall out of the laundry basket when I'm moving it to the washing machine for wor lass.

Not sure if this has been posted before or who’s come up with it but it looks fuckin great…. tiny footprint though, it would be a very tricky project… There’s further pics in the comments

Molde fans tonight..... 🎵 Small port in Ulster! You're just a small port in Ulster! Small port in Ulster! You're just a small port in Ulster! 🎶

"accidentally"

Nothing will top the top four era of Benitez, Mourinho, Wenger and Ferguson for being absolutely boring as fuck for the "big" games. They stank out the league and the CL regularly.

Gloomy the king.

Love it. Let me finish this off withouth the need for AI: How man the morale of this story therefore is, When life is all take and never seems to give, Hey man never forget you're ying to their yang, Thank fuck at least you weren't born a massive lad's fan.

Me and this thread now.

Don't joke, sometimes it's the bairns thongs that drop out. I'm not ready for this.

Sorry.

Adam Pearson; Toonpack, if I tried to say the v-word, you’d drown and my tongue would strangle itself. Let’s say you had a jab, yeah?

Or Starmer is getting bad news out early? Almost 5 years until the next GE man, who cares about polls at the moment? Getting things in order now will lead to improvements in the 5 year timeframe, in theory, in time for the next GE. I do agree with most your post but not about Farage. There is absolutely no way he will ever be PM. The higher he climbs, the more scrutiny he is under, and his beliefs on the NHS come to the fore as well as everything else, like him being a Putin stooge. He would horrify half the tory voting base. No point in comparing us to America and Trump, there is no equivalence imo.

Did she email him the questions then accidentally cc half the BBC in, possibly including her boss?

Was just about to post that. Accidentally = got caught.

Definitely my preferred option. Can the issue with buidling on Leazes park be solved? I mean, if they convert the current SJP footprint into a linked pocket park, I can literally see no downsides with the plan. It would be great for Leazrs Terrace too which would be opened up to face the new park on both sides. For those reasons, surely objections would be limited and the listing status cancelled?

save that gif for if/when we lose. and remember the Gloom reign is built on tyranny. bend the knee or i'll have your head on a spike

Fair play Villa. Did Liverpool win 5-0? I'm just reading how brilliant they were.

Speaking of the cocaine epidemic…

Nah, this is a panty dropper in Sunderland.

In Sunderland perhaps

Iran didn’t like the fact Saudi and Israel were making friends so they used one of their proxies (Hamas) to launch the terrorist attack on Israel last october. They did so knowing Israel would pummel Gaza in response. Netanyahu is going far beyond a reasonable response and is trying to wipe out all of Iran’s proxies on its doorstep by attacking hezbollah. I don’t think Iran wants war with Israel (its goals were to keep Israel as a pariah in the Arab world, so they achieved their objective). But if Bibi is bold (or insane) enough to attack Iran’s nuclear facilities then, which I think he might be, they would respond in kind. That’s when the US might intervene. The yanks hate the Iranian regime too and have been known to be invade and change regimes in that part of the world before. I don’t think there is much of an appetite for it however at this stage and neither presidential candidate wants to get involved in a new mess in the Middle East, which is why Netanyahu sees this as his chance to reshape the face of the Middle East and possibly cling to power if successful. That’s my analysis. I think Netanyahu is cut from the same cloth as Hamas and Hezbolllah and shoukd stand trial for war crimes

KD has entered the chat

I'm desperate for it to be Badenoch vs Jenrick in the final two.

Just been called up by Skoda, getting our new leccy enyaq on Monday despite ordering it in February!! Women of the world, if you have any panties, prepare to shed them next week.

Man United winning the FA Cup is a net good thing, I reckon. No Europe, but Ten Hag blowing their beans on shite in the summer, and securing himself a contract extension, along with us being the well-rested warriors for the rest of the season, will work out in our favour.

"Oops! Did I put those questions in an email to 'Big dog'? A complete accident and a silly one at that. How did I manage that? I'm so mortified!"

I didn’t declare shit. Know your place and run along with the other small folk

It’s probably good news for Trump’s charge for the presidency too because he can frame the narrative - the democrats allowed an escalation in the Middle East on their watch