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This thread:

"Have you suffered the loss of any footballers from your club who are black? Were they sold to somebody else and it wasn't your fault? Did the people replacing them have blonde hair and were pasty looking who you gave no permission for your club to sign? If so you may be due compensation. Call 0898 24/7 365 and ask for Fair Dinkum solicitors, because your gurn is our concern."

The NUFC negotiator for Guehi revealed.... 🎵You got to know when to hold 'em Know when to fold 'em Know when to walk away And know when to run You never count your money When you're sittin' at the table There'll be time enough for countin' When the dealing's done🎶

Unfortunately I’ve found Gemmil on twatter 😒

Tremendous scenes in the Brighton crowd when that went in. One bloke almost spilled his oat milk latte.

FYP

Sky: "Will Arsenal be Nelson Mandela or will Villa make them look more like Nissan Main Dealer? Find out after the break when it's LIVE!!"

Good old Fergie Time.

I have some free time so catching up on what Reddit says about Mintehs performance as I’ve not watched the game

Where do you even start with this?

How do you block a thread?

Imagine. What impresses me is that at least 60 of the fuckers are indulging in this weird delusion l

U ok, hun?

I still miss Messi tbh. Can’t believe we never got to see him play for us.

I don't mind people having an 'imagine' moment. I have often put the lottery on to enjoy the 'imagine' but never have I believed that I would win it. What gets me here is, why would you want a player to wear a top slagging off a celebrity linked to a club who are after your player then for your club to invest in a tractor to set fire to it? It is like some weird scenario that WWF used to do when I watched it as a kid. There are so many questions to ask about it as well. Where does he think the smoke would go? Does he think the game would take place next to a burning tractor? Are firefighters aware this is going to happen in advance and there on standby or does he imagine that they would ring 999 at half time? If they don't manage to get rid of all the current litter in the stadium, are they going to leave a burnt out tractor there indefinitely as a reminder that Ipswich put an offer in one of their players?

There’s that word again.

And yet will Hope stop masturbating while writing his articles? No. Completely ruined the train journey for everyone.

Survived the match. Pains me to say it, but getting the tickets and getting in and out of the ground was a piece of piss compared to St James'. Mackems played well but their strikers are woeful. If they can reinvest the Clarke money on a decent number 9 they should be in the playoffs at the end of the season

You'll be hungover and catastrophising 12 hours from now.

Another nadir in their tawdry list of ridiculously shite fantasies

The more I think about this the more it's pissing me off, I haven't seen much else about it elsewhere but they're absolutely rigging the competition for the usual suspects. Clubs in Europe already get a bye in the round we're playing Forest, (PL club, away, natch) but that isn't enough, the next round when they enter they can't play each other. How the fuck is that going to help them in Europe? the only thing it's going to help is their chances of getting to the next round, this absolutely stinks and isn't getting the coverage it should in my opinion? It also, as if needed in our case, increases our own chances of getting a hard fixture and making our own efforts to finally win a trophy that little but tougher. It really is a disgrace, this.

I trust polls as much as voters. It is not just a shame but a tragedy that half of the American population fo intend to vote for a totally unelectable baffoon. They are no better or worse than all those imbeciles who vote for AfD in German elections or demagogues like Le Pen, Farage, Orban et al. We will see what will happen in November but I do not hold my breath and won’t watcb this farce as it won’t be good for my health. Cunts. Everywhere.

Howe has a poor record against Bournemouth, so he’ll let Tindall take charge for this one and Howe will play in central defence. 1-0 up in the 97th minute, he’ll clash with [insert Bournemouth’s most annoying player here] and break their nose. Accepting his red card with the same grace and calmness he shows in press conferences, as he walks past Schar down the tunnel he turns and says “That’s how you do a proper headbutt, you swiss fanny”. Ref blows the whistle 30 seconds later. 1-0 to the toon.

If he goes out onto the pitch and does a full Hulk-O-mania Hulk-up routine, tearing off his top to reveal an NUFC shirt, I guarantee that you and him will win Pride of Britain awards.

Aye thats the problem it doesn’t take long for them to live vicariously through the dearly departed - even if that player got out as soon as he could. They’ll be cheering him on when Ipswich play us no doubt

It's Arteta's latest motivational device. They've all been in prison over the close season.

Arsenal's training top is a little bit Nelson Mandela-ish.

Barry Hearn and Don King have been known to.

2-0 spurs. Keeper fuck up, Calvert-Lewin at Everton these days.....

A mate got a chippy at Oldham I think it was and asked for batter to go with his chips and got the translation back and forth about scraps till they both understood what he wanted. He then asked for a can of pop, again quizzical looks before the wife obviously gave up and just guessed what he wanted. She charged him whatever it came to before presenting him with his chips with a tin of peas.

CT loves a right winger

No idea, just switched it on

And here are the lovely Mr and Mrs Harris ☺️

It sounds even more horrendous if you say it in a Brummie accent, so probably

From the distance, it seems that Palace is closing the door on negotiations and has convinced the player to be the captain. After the transfer market, he will surely get a pay rise and a renewal. I think it's time to move. There are players who can still fit in very well. And now we have two options. Look for a proven player to compete with Schar, or look for a player who is good now, but who is more of a prospect for the future. In the first group we can have those from Leverkusen (Tapsoba, Tah or Kossounou). There is also Schuurs. I wouldn't be surprised, because this guy shares an agent with Botman and I know that last year the club asked for a report on him (from a friend of mine who is a professional scout). In the second we have Antonio Silva or Diomande. We also have a third option: bring in some loaned player who doesn't seem to count for much at his club: Disasi or Lindelof. And finally, a fourth. Bring back some player who is in Saudi Arabia: Demiral

If by any remote chance Roger Tames is reading this, maybe I was a bit harsh with you?

Yep. Always was and is ‘batter’ up here as far as I know

Teams in Europe can't face each other in the next round of the league cup. Fuck right off, man.

No, Craig Hope formerly on NO school mare of KD ridiculed by a person munching bacon

Can't work out if this is a cat based pun or he doesn't know how to spell clause.

This shows how corrupt PSR is. How are we struggling to pay an extra £5m, with Saudi money backing us, for a defender yet a newly promoted team can spend £150m+ on an elite player?