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Would you be willing to miss out on Kid Dynamite this season if it meant we could land Guehi?

Worked there, weekend job, when I was 16. Menswear dept, are you being served had nowt on Parrish’s. Old Mr. (Harry) Foster, could sell a suit of armour as a swimming aid that bloke, suit arms too long “they’ll ride up with wear sir”. He was amazing. Customer in front of mirror checking the fit and Harry with a handful of the back of the suit jacket in his hand to make it look ok at front, whilst brushing the shoulders, turn customer round and repeat with the front grabbed. Fucking master he was, the number of happy customers who left with suits that fit like shit was legion.

Set up another meeting, look Parrishs dead in the eye and say, 'Although I admired your art deco department store on Shields Road, the Harrods of the East End in the days of my youth, I have to tell you ......"

I’d take the bid back down to our second offer and say take it or we’ll get the cunt for half price next summer.

HELMET!

Luckily CT took this pic and sent me it via PM after he was doing his peeping Tom act outside your window.

8 months for the looting. 4 years for the shirt

Our recruitment is a shambles like. We should employ their old mucker, Stewart Donald to help us out, drive a hard bargain, like he did for Griggs. Probably get Guehi at a snip for £210 million.

Aye, a department for everything. Leather goods was upstairs, the counter I worked faced the doors/stairs, remember once looking up to see a whole rail of leather jackets disappearing down the stairs at pace 😂

Parish needs an invite to the embassy.

How would you say you lads do with sarcasm?

Of course it is.

I blame you @Christmas Tree for this Mumsnet stuff, btw. @Gemmillwill posting photos of what pinny he wore to make it next. It's a dark road ahead.....

Labour should ban politicians having second jobs in the media, especially the news media. I mean it should happen anyway, but to get rid of this cunt is a bonus. He'll also have to admit he has dumped his loyal subjects in Clacton because of the money.

The number of breaks Fulham had that didn't end in a chance was nobody's business. They couldn't fashion an opening even when they had men over, the stupid twats. Gordon and Isak won't make those mistakes.

Too fucking late. 🙂

@toonotl

Speaks volumes that Trippier and Almiron don't get any minutes today. I suspect those 2 and Dubravka are the 3 players (other than Hayden/Fraser) that we try to move on next week

It's. Fucking. MBEUMO. M-B-E-U-M-O You. Thick. Cunts. Also for the last fucking time. He's 5 foot 7. Eddie Howe is not going to sign him. Get his name out of your fucking mouths.

Latest from over two hours of sky sports soccer Saturday, Newcastle United don't exist. Aren't tipped for the top 4, aren't tipped to be a surprise package and aren't tipped to be either relegated or be a underachiever. Back to the studio. *That'll teach me for watching it.

This is @Gemmill and Everton all over again.

You're correct in the main, I've got mates from Sunderland who have been amazing friends and similarly acquaintances who have been utter, utter bell ends. There are some differences though imo. Geordies tend to be excessively proud, boistrous, loud, optimistic people. Certainly when it comes to football. In the main we are only focussed on our team. Mackems tend to be miserablist pessimists, for good reason maybe. But many are undoubtedly obsessed with Newcastle more than their own team as a result and, imo completely unlike us, have a massive chip on their shoulders about it. Not just the club, the city, the people, our reputation, the industry, local governance, guitarists from Blyth and North Shields, literally everything. We do not go on like that. Their motto is about us - FTM. They use it everywhere. Our "motto" about them actually just relects their obsession. You also don't see it much. SMB. Other than that, as alluded to earlier, Newcastle is medieval destination tourist city. It's the endless subject of travelogues. Sunderland isn't and never will be. But many of them can't accept that.

Tell me your a pseudo intellectual Sunderland fan without telling me you're pseudo intellectual Sunderland fan. 4/10 must try harder.

https://sunderlandglobalmedia.org/when-did-the-sunderland-newcastle-rivalry-become-so-bitter-were-things-less-tense-in-the-past/ Too much in this just to highlight the one thing. The conclusion in particular though is quite something

I've listened to work related health and safety videos that had me more enthused than listening to Michael 'tremendous by the way' Owen.

Michael Owen's cameos will be like listening to the desk sergeant check you in at the local police station.

Nice little tie in with Chelsea where Palace are the “club of choice” for a fair few of the apparently limitless supply of CFC squad players who go out on loan to half a dozen clubs, never make it to the first XI and are then sold. Thats been going on long before Boely turned up too . Needless to say Chelsea’s cut has been an issue here, 20%? 😒

I wouldn’t be against Chalobah as a cheaper option for now and then source Schar’s long term replacement a bit further down the line tbh

"What's up guys? Wewlcome to my channewl and my EXCLUSIVE news that The Cwonicle thwu Lee Wyder are weporting that a fourth bid has went in for Guehi! I'm cuwwently sitting in a twain as I wecord this, click on the link below for my deep dive weview of vis LNER twain and five burning questions about how you should act on a twain without pawental assistance."

Doesn’t really roll off the tongue though, does it? Whereas, Northborough…

After a bottle of 19 crimes and a dark rum, nope, no siree, not well

US telly has Matt Holland and no real massive Liverpool bias from the commentator yet. In fact, I think he’s half hoping for an Ipswich upset

We create a bucketload of chances irrespective of their attacking weaknesses, at the back we’re not so resolute, Pope gets hurt again and we’re screwed. Improve what’s in front of him and you are also mitigating that. CB always was my opinion/#1 need, then developmental striker (we’ve done that) then RW and maybe a #6 although Hall may end up being the latter if extra protection needed. It’s as much “out of possession” contribution as the attacking stuff and Miggy in particular brings a shitload of that. Howe in his PC actually referred to/mentioned that. Yeah I’d love an elite winger but it ain’t critical to where we are just now IMO, it’s an icing on the cake sort of thing. Who are the elite in their early 20’s workaholic wingers? I have no idea tbh but Guehi is elite and likely will get better in a position of pretty imminent need.

A bit of obsession here about our transfers. This is another thing they do. Find a solitary tweet to reflect their prejudices, and pretend it represents the whole football community, when 99.999% of fans could not give a single fuck. In this case, steve_whufc7 is the man on the omnibus.

Yep, better to replace a player a year too early than a year too late.

How much extra do you think he charges to do one topless?

cost of living crisis and big spackas are handing this racist cunt £16k a month to wish their racist mates happy birthday.

CB is a priority because Schar is getting old as is Burn, Botman is fucked and out for ages (and may not be the same player when back) and Krafth/Lascelles are “last resort” CB’s and the other two are kids. We’re buying for now/the near future. RW is next priority I reckon and aye it’s Miggy/Murphy but also Gordon or Barnes if necessary. CB is way above RW in current needs. I think VVD is way over-rated these days and probably always was, he’s lucky he’s not played his career with strikers the level of a Henry or Shearer knocking about.

Has someone on there, one of the saner ones, not initiated an intervention for this daft cunt, yet?

Good idea slagging off the Irish and Italians as well for all the crime that came over with them. Not like there's many of them in the electorate.

Not if you're a mackem