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Judge's comments when dealing with one of the rioters recently. Oof.

Factoring in the losses of Minteh and Anderson this is a piss poor window so far. Are we paying the price of some serious spunkage in previous windows and the end of the 3 year period? Which, incidentally, is apparently how long my lass's last these days.

Gemmilled YP.

Toonpack was busy iirc

even if he's sold before I get my next springer spaniel I'd still be very tempted to call it miggy. love the way he runs about like a lunatic in circles with no real purpose whilst at the same time managing to look so very, very happy. top lad, loved his purple patch with us, admire him for not wanting to be fucked off to saudi and genuinely wish him all the best in whatever the future holds for him, including if it's immediately here.

I've just remembered, the last time I was abroad we were in Zanzibar and went out on this boat trip thing. There was a bit where you could get in the water and there was this old American wife there who was away on an organised trip with a bunch of other old people. But she was the only one who had come on the boat trip. So we're all in the sea and she starts basically saying she needs to get back to the boat. She wasn't having difficulties or anything, but I think that would have come if she'd stayed in. So I said howay, I'll swim back to the boat with you. But when we got to the boat, she couldn't climb up the ladder cos she had no strength in her arms or legs. So there's a bloke on the boat trying to pull her up, but he was fucking hopeless and he's shouting down to me to give her a push. But the only thing available to me to push was her big old swimsuit covered arse. So I'm trying to wait to see if dickhead on the boat can get her on, but she's in danger of falling back into the water and landing on me, so, one hand on the ladder for support, up goes the other hand, planted into her big old arse cheek, and pushed. I heard an audible gasp from the other people in the water at this assault. 20 minutes later we're on the boat, and she's full of gratitude and asking me and the wife to join her in the bar that night for a drink. I think she had designs on these hands ending up somewhere else, but the no friends on holiday rule was enforced in full. I waved at her when she was sat with all her old biddies in the restaurant later.

She was off that stage like a Rocket

At first glance I thought the plastic wrapping was actually cobwebs from those cans sitting in his basement.

Script for granny porn right there.

Or, of course, the genocide

Aye with Newcastle having two Unis and a colleage you'll get people from all over the region milling about in the Town centre. The idea of spotting someone in a Sunderland top, whipping your phone out, logging into a forum and posting about it for virtual high fives doesn't compute to me like. It seems mental viewing life through such a prism of hate for your nieghbours up the road. But then again if they'll try and prize bus doors open to get at petrified African migrants whilst smashing up your town centre, mag calling must seem pretty trivial to them, the set of cunts.

Time to change the thread title to Harry Mcguire.

I'm in Rhodes currently. It's fucking boiling! Wow.

Nah, they left because they didn't have jobs and were basically just two minority shareholders getting in the way of the people that had been appointed. They'll have been picking a decent wage up for their work, and you can't keep paying them once you've actually employed the people to do those roles. Also, they could dissent all they liked, but their 10% would have got them nowhere.

Exclusive! Leaked shot from Mackem kit launch promo

Mackems knocked out the league cup a round before we enter it. Again.

You need to get up in their grill and tell them what's what. Turn that jock accent up to 11 and grab them by the throat so your frilly cuffs are tickling their earlobes and tell them fucking what's what. Do it this weekend before the rot sets in.

keith losing what tiny little mind he has about north east journalists, in particular downie being too scared to say anything negative about newcastle or positive about sunderland for fear of being chopped up.... no keith you terminally stupid cunt, downie is a sports journalist, newcastle are relatively newsworthy, your club meanwhile is incredibly fucking shite. it really is that simple.

Hmmm…. there’s a lot in what you say but if we finish top 4 we’ll have had a very good season. There are a million different variables though supplied by maybe 7 other clubs all looking at the same thing. We could sell him and get a far better player in and sign Guehi and still finish 5th. At that point you’re suggesting our three best players will be (rightly) assessing their options. For me keeping our best players fit for 85/90% of the season is far more important than upgrading Miggy. Although am not objecting in any way to his departure and a better player coming in to replace him. It’s the deplorable fuckin bitterness some are displaying as if he is the key to next season. I really don’t think he is. Especially as he didn’t finish as a starter last season and he won’t start in front of Murphy this season. It’s frankly irrational and unneeded negativity before the season starts

Speaking of Caulkin......

I'd tell him to make all of his demands and then divide the lot by fucking two, cos he's only got one working leg.

That sounds suspiciously like bait to wind up the anti-Miggy morons tbh

Was asked, but Ginola vetoed it, he didn’t want to be out-hunked

Everyone was in agreement that RCB, RW and CF positions needed strengthening before the Summer. Osula fits the bill for the backup CF, but Schar Isn't getting any younger and we could do with a longer term replacement for him. As for the RW, it's the only position we haven't strengthened since the takeover. Almiron simply isn't good enough, despite working hard and seeming like a good lad. Our attacks consistently break down when the balls gets to him. It's no coincidence that we've been in talks with MLS and Saudi clubs, and I suspect Howe sees the RW as one of the key areas for strengthening.

Pelosi was interviewed by Goodall and Sopel on yesterday's news agents, and when asked about Truss saying the world would be safer if Trump won in November, her answer was "I'd say she doesn't know what she's talking about. Again. And the same for Boris Johnson."

They also had a photo outside of our club shop where the "que" was only 3 people deep for the new kit. The response was "Ha ha, stupid mag kernts, can't afford to buy their own shirts". Now I've no idea about the context of the photo, probably shot at 5am or something, and I don't care. But they can hardly have it both ways. Schroedinger's shirt. It is a weird obsession with them now like. Wonder what the next one will be, let's hope its in response to us actually winning a trophy, that wil absolutely break them.

it's odd I think. I mean since they got a new kit by hummel they've been queueing up in their tens of thousands to buy it. not only that, there's apparently millions of these tops on the black market as they break in to their club shop every night and empty the shelves. and yet the only time the cunts ever wear them is when they're hoying stones at coppers or looting vape shops. weird.

She’s dull as fuck and has seemingly backed the loser in Trump. It’s no surprise the clueless bint is fucking shite at the right wing grift she thought she could fall back on. She’s basically William Storey at this point

I wonder if Fulham's approach for Anderson is having an impact on these negotiations? If Palace were to lose Anderson and Guehi in one window, they'll need to spend a lot to replace them effectively. Also, if Guehi is the higher valued player, Palace must at least appear to play hardball for him, so that Fulham don't see them as a soft touch? I dunno, I'm just asking questions.. Get off my fucking back, you cunts.

Tbf, they do look pretty good for football ground bait. 3.5/10.

"That's not funny" Why are people gathering in a theatre to listen to this proven fool?

What have you got against James Tavernier?

Oddly enough, the mackems are upset that they're the only ones who are upset.

100% My lass says I have the greatest resting pissed off face she’s ever seen and that’s through years and years of practice. I started looking permanently angry and in a hurry so people didn’t stop me and got out of my way about 12 years ago and now it’s just my natural face. Works a fucking treat on holiday. Sometimes the lads who try and get you in their pub don’t even try

Lads, deactivate your twitter accounts. If it's not the far right arranging riots, it's reactionary dickheads posting on the NUFC hashtag. You're being radicalised. You're one election cycle away from voting Reform.

the daft cunt must’ve really hit rock bottom to have started flogging that dead horse again. You can’t even get the last remaining out of date stock on Amazon anymore.

I hope she fucking rinses the cunts. https://www.theguardian.com/technology/article/2024/aug/14/jk-rowling-and-elon-musk-named-in-imane-khelif-cyberbullying-lawsuit

Fake Water Taxi

An excellent publicity campaign from the RSPB.

I think I've mentioned I've been going to Ayia Napa in October for the last 6 or 7 years and I find especially as you get older 25 degrees makes a much better holiday than the stupid says of 30/35 plus when I was young and daft (and in very early days limited to shipyard/pit fortnight). Last year I went very late (last week in October/first in November) and though generally good there were a couple of cloudy/showery days. This year I'm going at the start of October.

I just don't understand the logic in having such an upset about it. I live in Newcastle so I probably might be more likely to own one if I lived somewhere else. I've been to two funerals where you were encouraged to wear black and white, one when my mate died when he was 20 of appendicitis. Even then it feels no different to the ones where you get asked to turn up in bright colours. Both seem like I am wearing the wrong thing as it is just different. It just doesn't cross my mind when I see someone wearing a top unless I think it is a good design or if it is a club that I don't immediately recognise e.g. when people started to wear the South Shields or Gateshead tops.

The same way players who go to Liverpool develop asthma.

this cunt not threatened to go on strike yet?

I can’t see anything but an absolute arseburner for Southampton. 5-0. Hattrick from Anderson, two each from Dummet and Ritchie.

Life of Pi, disappointing, 3.141592

You have to fancy us at home to Southampton. It'll be a colossally shit result if we got beat and a bad one just getting a draw with it being the opener at home.