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Imagine it was just Howe being petty like a wife knocking back all suggestions for dinner because you haven't done the dishes when you said you would. PM: "What about Mbappe for RW, we can make it work - the commercial deals he brings pays his wages and sign on bonus, and he's free." EH: "No, it's fine." PM: "Come on Eddie, don't be like that." EH: "You never listen to me." PM: "I do, but we desperately need improvements at RW and a long term replacement for Schar." EH: "What about in goal?" PM: "We already have five goalies on the books." EH: "WHATEVER! WHY DON'T YOU JUST GET WHATEVER YOU WANT THEN?! I DON'T EVEN CARE!"

That's the spirit!

Interesting maybe but the fuck am I cheering myself up on a Thursday morning by listening to 39 minutes of the parents of a murdered newborn.

All McClaren will do is get the squad to say things like that so he can really nail the accent. I can't wait until he braids that little hair island.

There can be only one! Arsenal player now by the looks of it.

The new Shane has arrived!

Useless Scottish bastard is out.

im sure Eddie will do a good job with him. I suspect this signing is a sign we'll be keeping Wilson as 2nd choice. We've got Tonali and Willock back (like new signings). If Thiaw comes in that will shore up the defence so we should just spaff out heavily on a RW.

This should shut PL and tbd RIGHT up. A £10m striker from Sheff United. PIF POWER!

"Wah good? mi incredibly proud tuh sit before yuh as di new head coach of Jamaica. Obviously, mi ave had sum ups an downs inna mi carea mi did great at Middlesborough, rubbish at England. Excellent at Twente but den relegated Newcastle. Mi helped tun Man Utd inna a basket case inna di laas two seasons. Now mi deh yah fi get Jamaica tuh di promise land of coming close tuh qualifying fi di world cup. Cum wi guh reggae boyz"

You’re spying on us???? 😱

TBD and PL whatsapping each other 'FFS man, get on TT and complain like'

It's just as well tbh the old Shane was definitely on the wayne. For our visual learners: is on the

This reads like something out of Adrian Mole 😂

I think it was a right hook

"just asking the question" is up there with "makes you think" in the lexicon of thick cunts stirring up shit

Could CT finally have the hang of this LB lark?

Mental! This lad has been signed by people whose jobs hang on these decisions but folks are upset. He's exactly what we needed, a young developmental striker to sit behind Isak and Wilson, he hopefully won't get near the pitch this season, as a starter anyway. Edit - unless of course he gets Eddie'd and is mint.

My mate who's a Blades ST holder said this; 'He only really broke through last year and is a bit of unknown still. But I suppose for £10m for Newcastle that's nowt and under Howe he's surely just going to improve. Good deal alround i would say. He wont have the pressure of being a main striker and can have time to develop under a decent gaffer and playing with decent players'

21 appearances, zero goals, zero assists. He better be a late bloomer.

Seems highly rated tbf. And if he has anything about him at all, I trust Howe to get it out of him. If Wilson is going to stay, then this is the kind of profile you’d expect for third striker

to-Oo-oo meeeeeeeeeeeee

Someone always asda lower the tone.

FYP

He’ll look like Aldi Mick Hucknall.

Better than Bruce tbh, all he'd do is order beer can sand-wedges

He's only been in the job five minutes, give him a chance. You'll be starting on Starmer next...

At what point do we start annihilating Mitchell? ….. cunts fuckin useless from where I’m sat

❌ New Japanese Posters ❌ New Jamaican Posters

This is why it ended so badly. The tit count went alarmingly downhill. They tried to rescue it with a flurry at the end but alas it was too late.

This era Ms. Carey was truly trouser-troubling.

McClaren got the Jamaica job. Fuck me, I hope he does the accent again.

How about you debate them on the issues?

Works better grammatically if it's a couple buying it. 7/10

Funny story about how he got into it...

Given Willock's injury record, I'm pleased to see the new performance director is insisting on a crash helmet during pre season.

Yeah, there's a canny long thread on it.