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Way better odds than wor lass doing it.

exile 1968's lost the plot, hashtagging the king and queen of paraguay.

Honestly mate, as much as we all love him, I wouldn't listen to a word he says about cooking, let alone medical things. Sorry to hear this like. Ears are canny delicate and can get fucked up by infections and the like. I once flew back from the states and got off the plane to find I had lost my sense of balance. Was really distressing, it was like being very drunk most the time, and this lasted several months before resolving itself. You may get better just with more time. Otherwise you may need a hearing aid to match your geps.

Al-Shabab aren't even owned by PIF. This is amazing.

£80m per leg, so once you factor in his right leg that's about £60m.

The fewm on x already

Maybe it's because I'm from the other side of Madrid (Atlético) and I may feel that I'm not very objective (I don't think so), but I didn't see anything different yesterday between Real Madrid and Almería than what I've seen all my life. Real Madrid is the team that benefits the most from referees in the world and to which nothing extra-sports will ever happen because its president has all the powers in the country and possibly in Europe bought into it (I'm not saying this, it was said by the Director of El Mundo , the most important newspaper in Spain). As for the second... I also miss writing more here. But lately I don't have much time. Since November I have changed jobs and I can barely stay in front of the computer.

Beeeewwwww! Is this still part of the master plan?

I’ve done quite a bit of reading on Roman Britain, and the Roman names of places throughout the region. Newcastle obviously was Pons Aelius, its suburbs Wallsend and Benwell were Segedunum and Condercum, Corbridge was Corstopitum, then you’ve got places like Vindolanda that didn’t last through to the modern age. It’s weird that I’ve never seen the Roman name for sunderland listed in any book or paper on Roman Britain… I know they didn’t bother naming insignificant little settlements that served them no purpose, but that can’t be the case with such a cultural and industrial hub as sunderland , can it?

I have been deaf in my left ear since 16 December. Sinuses were full of matter from rancid illness, which spread into and out from my inner ear, bursting my ear drum. I was working for about a week, absolutely sick of my life, with some rolled up tissue paper - looking not unlike a cigarette - sticking out of my ear to soak up the pinkish goo coming out at an alarming rate. At the Christmas do I had arranged for the company (and therefore felt obliged to attend) I forewent the ear-tab approach and had the delightful new experience of feeling my fucking ear dripping onto my shoulder. All the best Gemmill, tinnitus is fucking irritating. I had to wean myself off earplugs when the second kid was born as it just felt a little unfair to blissfully sleep through both the cunts crying.

Also if we're doing business with Milan we should recalibrate the zero starting point to 55 fucking million.

We can rebuild him. We have the technology. Ahh fuck man.

Boo boys to Longstaff:

Ashley gave poor players good wages so they had no reason to leave and he didn’t have to buy anyone, we’re now struggling with getting them off the books due to this. Then when we do manage to get rid of some of these absolutely honking players all the NUFC Twitter lot praise them for being “superb servants” and praise them for being fouled against Leeds . Manquillo was on something like £30k a week, that’s not being loyal that’s simply staying where you’re fucking overpaid. On Eales I honestly think he’s just playing it smart, riling up other clubs and stirring the conversation - it even led to Emery making a similar statement about being limited by FFP. I think we have room to sign players this window I just don’t think they want to be forced into overpaying in a window that you often have to. They probably think we will be getting players back from injury soon and will be able to turn things around to a degree to close the season out where we then will have a profitable FFP year on our record going forward.

I desperately don't want us to sign Solanke, the figures being quoted for him are a joke. Hes 26 and this is the first time hes managed double figures in the premier league. He only got 6 in 32 starts last season. Hes a 50 million pound dwight gayle.

Edwards is saying we want Gibbs-White to replace Almiron. On the plus side, that would be a phenomenal signing. On the negative side, it’s Luke Edwards reporting it

Are you off your tits again?

Renton - “ Whilst the data for clearing earwax is inconclusive, the risk of setting your head on fire is a positive 85%. “

0-0 bore draw Isak with a brace

Theyre getting rid of all the top shaggers

Scotty, just get them to give you a bionic ear to go with the jumper pack they put in your chest, you'll be right. Maybe see if they can give you a two for one and get that strap on implant as well. Hope it all turns out to be nothing and things right themselves. Remember if you listen to the Jesus and Mary Chain, you won't notice the tinnitus.

Wykiki is going going to don his Almiron 24 nufc kit and wank in to a right boot to celebrate this.

Don't get Renton started FFS

Amanda: "Fancy putting a bid in for Miggy?" Al-Shabab: "How much do you want ?" Amanda "HE IS NOT FOR SALE. I'm not accepting anything other than £100m GOD DAMN IT"

Aye, I had a shit night’s sleep. The wind was fucking horrendous. Sounded as bad as Arwin a few years back though probably less damaging due to the more ‘normal’ direction this time. Coupled by having to go to Birmingham this morning. Although my train was cancelled I was able to catch a slightly later one which I was delighted about. It did make think about the hurricanes in places like the Caribbean though. Where the winds are sometimes 2-3 times stronger than that. That must be genuinely terrifying

Check out Alan Oliver Edwards here

Not to mention was it just a few months ago they were fewming for not getting selected for the Euro bid?

This amuses me. Their seats hav turned pink again. Not sure the frat boy will be able to get away with the same grift again getting the fans to do it for a Kingsfood hotdog in a burger bun.

Last season they were 4th in the Championship based on away matches, 16th based on home matches. That tells you all you need to know.

I mean wtaf? If RTG if anything like representative (I’d like to think it’s not btw) then a canny few thought Mowbray’s time was up. I couldn’t get my head round that but who in the name of god do they think their owners would have lined up if Beale was forced out after a handful of games? You’re probably looking at someone already there holding the reins until the end to f the season. I know I’m biased but I’ve never known a fanbase so determined to make life difficult for their own team playing at home. I really don’t get it. Then they have the cheek to go on like they have a vastly superior fanbase to us and massive they are and all that accompanying shite

"Jew-lee-us See-zaire was a mackem, marra. That's why the Romans wanted to conquer Northumbreeya, to wipe out the mags."

Could’ve been worse- could’ve been £1270.

I think it might have been one of your posts in the music recommendation thread that set this whole thing going. The Various Sounds of DIY.

If I had to pick a player out of the first XI to sell to finance 2 or 3 new players it would be Almiron or Burn. And Almiron is worth 3x what Burn is

It'd miss

Too late.

I haven’t travelled much cross country in years on the train. It’s fucking snail’s pace once you get past York and leave the East Coast Mainline. If only there’d been some high speed link planned

'thErE aLl tHe saMe thE culLudS'

saudi cunts got maxi for a snip, it's payback time.

got to be worth at least £80m?

I slept on the middle floor last night, cos sleeping in our bedroom up in the roof is noisy as fuck but also genuinely feels like something is gonna come loose. I'm an ear plug boy as well. I think I'm gonna get some moulded ones made both for sleeping and for loud environments (if I ever choose to leave the house again). April last year, I got a sort of blocked ear like I had a cold or whatever. Took ages to sort itself out, during which time my hearing in that ear was bollocksed. Anyway, when eventually the blocked feeling went, it was replaced by permanent hearing loss at higher frequencies (had two hearing tests to confirm this). Also my dickhead of a brain has decided that cos I can't hear those frequencies any more, maybe I'd like them replaced with round the clock high pitched tinnitus. Been for a CT to check for some neuroma (growth pressing on the auditory nerve), but didn't show anything. Waiting for an MRI to check the same thing, but basically nowt to worry about. It's NOT ageing related cos it's unilateral and happened really quickly which is why they're doing these further tests. Anyway, fortunately my hearing in my right hear is very good, but this was all a long winded way of saying I'm gonna protect what's left on both sides by being the sad cunt in earplugs at gigs etc.

Currently needing the famous Chinese Chow Mein hangover cure as it stands. 13 hour drinking day with the lads from work yesterday and if someone had offered me a lethal injection when I woke up this morning, I’d have snapped it up. That’ll be me done with big drinking for a while, I have to say. I had a quality day but is it really worth feeling this shite? Probably but shine a light

Yet another player that has been here for a ridiculously long time. Coming on 7 years ffs. The amount of players who should have been stopgaps who have hung around for years is unbelievable. Cheers, Ashley

Considered ear candles?

It's not though. We have to sell before we buy means we categorically cannot buy anyone until we bring some money in from player sales. He didn't say that so there's no reason to assume that it's true. You then said "if we need to sell before we buy, why are we turning down offers for players". But nobody every said we had to sell before we could buy. So the specific language really is important and it isn't just semantics.