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No bandages left.

“ And that, kids, is how I met your mother…”

Pretty impressive at your age 👍

We were knackered keeping them at bay but what was a bit disappointing was when they tired a bit and we had possession towards the back end of that game we made the wrong pass, didn't pass at all or overhit it. Long term we need to replace Burn as he couldn't overlap Barnes near the end and we need to look at upgrading almiron as he hasn't got a right foot or a particularly great football brain. Thought our South American players weren't particularly at it and Bruno's fluffed chance summed up his game. Schar and Botman were excellent.

I’m beginning to think the pundits’ predictions were right. This may not be our season to win the title.

Could the Australian jury please make up their fucking mind?

Years ago about four or five of us ended up on a boat disco cruise on the Tyne for a work night out, when we got on it was all women, two separate groups of them, straight away, as soon as we walked onto the boat one of them, already pissed, from the group from Seaham iirc, got her tits out for us and said 'do you like these?' I realised then that it was going to be an eventful night. Towards the end of it, the DJ played some game where they had to grab a garment from a man, long story short I ended up bollock naked as the pack of feral females basically jumped on me, yanked my clothes off, (unfortunately that was the only thing they yanked off), then hid my clothes. Luckily by that point in the night I'd had enough drink myself to just laugh it off and go with the flow so I just went on the dance floor with them with not a care in the world before the sight of a young stallion in his prime and glory became a bit too much and my items of clothing started to slowly return although I never did get one sock. My hondacrackas were the last to appear so they obviously liked something they saw?

To a festival

Well I didn’t envisage this on a round the harbour cruise on a rainy Friday night

And we're somehow suffering for their sins. The common belief, perpetuated by virtue signalling media, is that we've bought our success. Whilst our purchases have been key to our continual improvement, not one of them in isolation was outside the price range of a midtable premier league team, let alone one easily selling out 50k+ seats, and critically none of them are players at the top end of premier league wages. Having qualified for the champions league we still haven't moved away from that highly disciplined approach, making astitute purchases of emerging stars who aren't at the peak of their abilities and earnings. We're building a team, not buying one.

Agree with this. I was trying to cast my mind back to how I felt when Chelsea and Man City were taken over, which both pissed me off. But it wasn't the nature of their owners, it was the fact that they had unlimited funds to distort the game. Now they've pulled the drawbridge up and FFP has put paid to this. There are issues with this and its clearly intended to preserve the status quo, making it hard for NUFC to break through. I think this documentary is chronicling the process quite well and highlights how good the board is.but for me it's a bit dry and boring. Footage from STID series 3, showing Man with Beanie hat watching WaU: [mackem] A see rhey hold their board room maytings in Annick castle marra. Fick jawdee bastards divent knar those Percys was crusaders marra! Ha ha FTM. How Julie, ya got me cheese slice eady for the Rotherham gayme? [\mackem]

Wtf?

What a CUNT Fletch is. Apparently our problem is how do we score. Aye, we struggled last week you massive NONCE

He's not very good is he? All the professionals they've hired as well? Should've hired a pro..... '...... Did you seek any advice from any old Newcastle players like Franz Carr or Lee Bowyer before signing?'

They don't announce anything these days until our in-house interviewer has had a chance to completely take the shine off their day with some godawful questions.

Yeah like how much money they stand to lose

How very dare you! (As if I'd marry a mackem).

You have managed it so well. Hat doffed.

He was talking about our players though. 🙂

I agree but might change my mind if Diego comes up with a better summary.

Taking my huffy hat off, it's a sign of how far we've come when we play the CL winners and don't really turn up, and still manage to keep it to 1-0.

Derailing the topic I see...

You have no idea how much I'm actually looking forward to that trip. Many of my best memories are of winters spent in Stocksfield in front of a coal fire watching Billy Connolly stand up. Half Indian, half Polish/German/Scottish/Irish genes. "Hairy" is an understatement. Aye, I'm an ungrateful cunt too. At least I'm self aware.

Fully agree. We can get a result anywhere else but this is a tough ask Literally the best team on the planet. Probably including national trams.

Hey ho. Bit of a reality check there. We never got going but no disgrace in a 1 nil loss at the etihad. Just disappointed we didn't play better and give them a genuine test.

In the case of a hung jury we flip a Koala to decide.

Greilash is such a fuckhead. Looks like a character from Melrose Place with his 90s spaztard haircut.

You know we’re not the team in blue?

Pretty much how Celtic fans view Ally McCoist.

We probably owe both al hilal and Fulham if penfold and Ashley did the deal.

These are just a level above, it's that simple. When you're constantly defending and covering spaces unfortunately it fucks you so absolutely no shock we're struggling with possession especially as these know what they're doing. Hopefully we keep them out and get a break up front but can't say I'm too confident.

Gordon with a miracle touch bringing back Ruben Diaz from the brink of death, you'd think he'd have been more appreciative.

He was a breath of fresh air for Scottish football. I was watching so many Celtic games the last few years that Mrs Blastronaut bought me a Celtic mug at Xmas. Loved watching his press conferences when he was up here, he can be a right prickly fucker but he's was razor sharp, especially when dealing with dickhead reporters fishing for a headline. I think one of my favourites was a reporter asking him after a defeat if he might dial back the heavily offensive style hes always favoured. "If you're a vegetarian you don't just pop into McD's for a burger whenever you're hungry, mate".

Don't be daft

Pretty sure I predicted Man United would be looking for a new manager within 18 months. I hope they stick with him though, he's a big fucking arrogant fraud who has been given an incredibly easy ride by the media.

I absolutely love to see Man Utd get beaten. They've been shite.

Been a while since a manager at a big club has rode his luck quite like Ten Hag, like. They look completely clueless here and he’s persisting with Rashford through the middle where he’s shite

Aye I think most of us City fans are wary off this fixture, even being at home. Newcastle seem ready for a title tilt this season and I for one am looking fw to it. Especially if it means the red clubs noses are put out of joint. But City right now seem a little dazed by the treble, we're still full of energy but not the imagination, we've lost a lot of the creativity right now and if we get a result out will be through playing solid as a team rather than relying on kdb or haaland alone.

Oh fuck 🙁

Fucking hell, they will try any angle they can.

you know that, like you, I was more of fan of ASM than most on here. But he’s gone. Time to let it go and get behind the players who are here. I don’t get why you’re on Gordon’s case so much. He underwhelmed last season but he’s still a kid. And he’s clearly put the work in during the summer and got a brilliant assist for our opening goal last weekend. Eddie likes him and that’s good enough for me. Barnes meanwhile got a goal and an assist in a 20 minute cameo. Criticism there is just odd.

Nicely done Gemmill

I think we need to start a support group.

Pleased for him.

Corporate brochure is exactly what spring to mind after episode 1. But I’ll still watch the rest and think it gives a bit of insight. Also agree with HMHM how it was good not to have the usual rent a gob (shites) ‘representing’ the fanbase

Surely you could have come up with a better pseudonym than "Beswick", though.

True Will be mint at left back with someone like Gordon or Barnes in front of him