Leaderboard

5 points from 1 game, canny. Keep this form up and I can see us getting 100 plus points this season.

For any Americans reading this, it means Gloom is out of the country, it’s not him coming out as trans.

It's a scene straight out of Oor Wullie. Willy and Soapie Soutar jumping over the kebab shop counter in one frame and the next frame is the two of them inexplicably wearing red cabbage wigs.

I know a lot of their fans think they're great to watch. I've got their game on and I totally agree.

Who was the moon howler who had vendettas against certain players and made up various infantile acronyms about them?…. he hated the mackems (fair enough) but was a bit obsessively pathetic about it? LTA is him iyam

Surprised the slack cunt knows what inaugural means. Probably thinks it comes with chips

Renton disagrees.

Just popped on their board after a busy day and this was the first post about today's match. Going to be a long hard season.

yeah but when will you answer Leazesmag’s simple question?

I've just rang an ambulance for you. Should I cancel?

This long sentence, btw. I can only apologise, I've just read it back and even I'm baffled by it.

Who kept using TOT Lascelles? He wasn't wrong like.

Moon Howler

This prick, Skylon, is one of the worst when it comes to taking the moral high ground. Here he is frapping himself off silly with fantasies about the Seaburn Casuals. What a dick.

Alex is always over confident though.

Whilst Wilson deservedly is getting credit for the hold up, the pass from Murphy to Wilson on the first goal is lovely, and also the quick pass to Wilson for the second ( can’t see who it was). Barnes’ calm finishing for both is very nice to see too.

Barnes, Gordon, Murphy, Wilson, Almiron, Isak and Anderson all deserving of a spot in the front 3 on pre season showing. Tough decision coming up for Eddie

They’ll never go up as long as that stadium stays as toxic as it is. Lovely

It’s a good job they don’t want to be in the murderous, amoral Premier League anymore, isn’t it?

I’ve told you before, the sun comes up then the moon. Then the sun, then the moon. When will you understand!

Another bumbling goal.

3 points and...

We're top 6 now lads. We're the rule makers.

I just think the perfect window doesn't exist. You take advantage of the opportunities to sign your targets as and when they present themselves. If you go into the window thinking you'll only buy targets in a certain order, you'll either end up with nothing or having to drop down your list of targets for each position to satisfy your sequencing requirement. Get what you can, when you can, and you'll be stronger when the window shuts, if not necessarily in all positions. I think Howe still wants a CB though. He's ruled out a CF on required price but said ideally he wants two more in, including Livramento.

Nowt like a completely needless rule to ensure the team with home advantage win it

That's the one.

Barnes has already got more goals for us than ASM managed all last season.

You heard it here first 👆

Too late.

Probably bodes well that we’re unbeaten in pre-season, after playing some genuinely good sides, whilst never actually playing our strongest XI. The squad depth from the midfield onwards is tremendous. If you can get a right footed centre half and this young lad Murphy is actually the real deal at LB, we’re not far off tbh

Red card, sir!

What was even better was his insistence that only he had told us about something so obvious that nobody disagreed with that he thought he was the only one who had noticed.

PrecisedYP

Boring Bastard if they were referring to themselves?

Only a matter of time before Adam P is co-comms on Sky for Newcastle games.

Genuinely don’t know if this is a parody account at this point. Does Anderson have more skill moves on FIFA or something?

Rent FRee tbh

You can add JD sports to sugar puffs, dawnie, downie and Alan Parry to be included in the mackem fatwa/boycott.

So does that mean if you draw 5-5 you get 6 points but, if you win 1-0 you only get 4 points?

We weren't nearly as effective when Longstaff was out injured so I think this is an important signing

If I was tapping up his lass regularly, you’d never take the smile off my face. That’s Italians for you

3 – 0 And fuck him the throat stroking bollockless cunt.

Especially when you consider that we got Gordon with his seven goals for half that price.

This is our year lads, I can feel it. The Sela Cup is coming home!