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I don’t really get what the fuss is about ASM is fine, just fine, that’s all, he’s alright, decent, nothing special really. he’s pretty fun to watch when he gets his dribbly stuff going but you know watching that it’s rarely going to be productive because he’s a superb dribbler and a mediocre final ball player or finisher. When we were shit that was plenty, a rare bright spark because he could create something out of nowhere just often enough for us to stay up. We aren’t that team anymore though, we create from our plan, we score because we have good players putting that plan into action. We don’t need Allan saint maximin now like we used to, so he can be sold to make us a better team which should ultimately be what we all want.

You'd imagine we have to go through with the pretence of negotiations to make it look above board. Something like this:

If we were linked with Maxi who was playing for Brentford and he had the STATS he had last season, no cunt would want him. Especially if the other option was a player who smashed in 13 from the wing in a relegated team. Sort of exciting to watch on his day but that’s only about 3 times a season and we need to circumvent the status quo stabiliser that is FFP. If this move funds Barnes, Livramento and a couple of others, it’s an absolute no brainer

I'm still not over Supermac leaving

As if our entire fanbase hasn't been predicting his sale for about 6 months

I was about to say the fewm must be absolutely honking over there. It's not 2-3 months ago some of them were convinced he'd be heading back there as player manager

That's a terrible slur on the reputation of Khizanishvili & Sons.

Haven’t you got pics of young adults with speech impediments/mild undiagnosed autism to be pouring over?

His one footedness is fucking painful as well. From what I've seen of last night's highlights, Tonali looks like another natural footballer in the same way Bruno looks. He looks strong on the ball as well. If I was ASM, I'd be on my way for £10m a year. He's not gonna go to a club that wins things, so trophies aren't in his future anyway. He might as well work on his bank balance in a league where he'll enjoy the freedom to do his thing. I don't think going to the Saudi league is any slight on his character or his ambition either BTW.

Fist, your truck exudes a certain charm

He’s only going there to earn the money to buy the club and bankroll them to the Premier League title.

Martins transports. Delivery within 21 or 28 years.

Didn't know he had made a game. I play and design a few myself. Had a look at his game though, and it isn't great! Can't see how it took him 9 hours to teach it! Looks very flashy but in the end it didn't deliver

Craig Hope made a good point on his latest video. We talk about ASM in terms of the 3 or 4 good games he had last season. You need players you can forgive for 3 or 4 bad games, not ones where you can only point to the 3 or 4 good. It's obviously less black and white than that in reality but you get what he's saying. There's no room for passengers in a team that wants to go places.

I don’t know if anyone is interested but Almiron would have to be at the absolute peak of his potential market value now. And I think he’s a decent player, with a great attitude and athleticism. But I think the first half of last season was him having a purple patch and certainly not the norm. Which isn’t to say Howe hasn’t improved him. But I don’t think he’ll ever be a natural finisher

Fucking yanks will put Trump in the White House, possibly TWICE, but Joelinton can't get over there to play a few football matches.

Whoa, Dr PaddockLad and his social media based neuro divergent diagnoses!

When you've trudged through the heartbreak of losing Beardsley, Gazza, Waddle, Cole and Shane etc Nothing hurts anymore.

Daft thing is he only posts that if those sorts of comments get to him. So he’s only revealing they do

He's a taxi driver.

Is this last season? Last season he played 3 90 minute Premier League games. THREE! FUCKING THREE. No wonder his stats are inflated with that. Are you a Tory? Adding 20k coppers to the streets. OH To Replace the TWENTY THOUSAND YOU FUCKING BINNED!!!

What a bellend. Surprised he's not doing a chicken dance or something as pleased as he seems with himself

ALL of them. I have it on good authority that PIF is playing a blinder and reporting specific installments only to different journos.

I fully expect you and @Howay to start the singing off. "Magpies! Fight! And win!"

If T-Rex goes there it’ll be like a 100 megaton shitbomb dropping on wearside ( not that anyone would notice any difference).

How many of these knuckledraggers would turn down/or already are/ have been, oil workers in the Gulf?

Quinnys- High Tonnage, High Speed …over a yard.

Do us all a favour when Maxi goes...

Pancrate Crate Movers? 🤔

I think the reaction from Howe is spot on. You can really argue about the merits of ASM leaving, so it’s quite sensible not to piss off the player in case the transfer actually isn’t going through but on the same hand appeasing the fan bois that a sale is down to financial needs and take the flack off a replacement.

Poultry in motion

The Ivy Road shooting! The most exciting thing to happen in Gosforth since Donna Air.

Oh thats genius, do you have Howe's number, please call him and tell him you've figured ASM out. All we have to do is play him for about 270 minutes a season where he can get his usual 2 goals and 1 assist for the year.

The son with the Ferrari is now the owner. The dad must be long dead now. My uncle knew them both well as the dad in particular was bang into horse racing and was always at Gosforth Park. Apparently he was a good bloke and he built the business. The son fancied himself as a bit of playboy and got the Ferrari because he fancied himself as being a bit like Crockett off Miami Vice (the original 80s series) He nearly wrecked the business and the old man had to come out retirement at one point. The son got involved with a ‘well known family’ from the west end. They were using the haulage company to move some of their ‘merchandise’. The son then got cold feet and got a visit from said family asking if he’d like to buy some fire extinguishers. He didn’t get the hint and some vehicles mysteriously caught fire. The son arranged a meeting with them and took a bloke who fancied himself as a bit of a hard man as protection. The wannabe hard man had a gym off gosforth high street and was later involved in Newcastle Blue Star FC going bust. Which may have been more than just poor fortune. This wannabe hard man got kneecapped for his trouble shortly afterwards and ended up having part of his leg amputated. The son who shares his name with a gif-happy poster went to the police and had an armed police guard for ages. I used to see them as his dad moved into some flats right next to where my mam and dad used to live at south gosforth. And they’d always be parked outside keeping an eye out when the son was visiting. Presumably he’s learnt his lesson as this was the best part of 30 years ago

I did a week's work experience there. The experience was sitting around doing nowt then handballing boxes of chep tinned ham out of a full truck with another kid from my school. The son had Ferrari testarossa under tarpaulin in the warehouse as he was banned and I remember the father taking my mate's dad down to London to watch Bruno take on Tim wetherspoon, paid for everything. We did get a tenner at the end of the week but the lesson it gave me about what not to do was probably too late by that point as the damage was done.

Eddie Howe is the consummate professional and a nice bloke, who's saying the right thing about a bloke that has been a good servant to the club. That's all that's going on there.

Andrew is probably meaning Twitter and other areas, a lot of fans are so over the top about a player who puts out extremely average numbers in terms of actual impactful output. His dribbling is obviously very good which catches the eye but his goals and assists numbers are poor, I think 10 combined is his best season for us. The level of discussion about him far outweighs his actual contribution to the team, which is why I agree with Andrew’s post. For example he is often credited with keeping us up over the Bruce years, the reality is it was Willock, Wilson, and arguably Shelvey when you look at the goals, assists and the games they come in, he was no doubt the most exciting player but as others said that was a time we had no plan and his mazy runs that went nowhere had potential, now they’re just fucking frustrating because we have an actual approach to creating and scoring goals and many of those runs to nowhere just turn the ball over. I’ll remember him fondly as he really was the player that caught your eye for a few years but it’s time for him and the club to move on. We could basically go out and get Barnes, Goretzka, and Livramento for the fee under FFP.

She's the spit of him when you see her face at the end 😂 A very healthy lady, if you know what I mean, by the end of her training, but the face would perturb me to say the least given her resemblance to Big Joe.

Kazenga err Bazinga!

I know football's changed a bit but I went to McCoist's testimonial and their first chant after they equalised (think it was that "Follow" one) is still the loudest noise I've heard at any football match. (Which made our winner all the better for it - just like last night). I still think they're sectarian royalist bastards buts hats off where its due.

2-1 FTH

Id happily swap ASM and Almiron for Barnes and Chiesa in the squad. Although, if the ASM cash allows us to sign another 2-3 players, I'd sooner keep Almiron as a squad player and try to get shot of Fraser, Hendrick, Hayden, Lewis etc first Slightly strange that Lewis, our 3rd choice LB, has started both pre-season games

That article about the launch of that Greek mythology-based board game. I kind of quite liked his doing it, just for it being so off the wall really. But when it said he spent nine hours taking people through the rules

Congrats, Strawb. Hope you’re enjoying this fine moment of peace while you still can

Went up for this and thought it was a decent enough test for the lads. First half we were very good, without threatening too much and even in the second half, I thought the kids did a pretty admirable job. Miley, Murphy and Ashby stood out as players who could well have a future. First time in Ibrox and I’m very disappointed that they fired out goal music when they scored.