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Ten Hag isn't sure that he'll be fit. *SPOILER ALERT* He will be.

One for @Gemmill......

Nah, wait for his first run down the right wing then get Lascelles to go in two footed from the sideline. Red card but we keep 11 men on the pitch.

Meanwhile, CT finds himself in Brixton, on his 3rd Erdinger, desperately asking if anyone knows where “DJ Gloom” lives?

Hope resorting to stealing his exclusives from Toontastic’s finest investigative journalist.

Ten Haag can have my balls in play on his chin as he sucks my cock, to be quite fucking honest with the Dutch manc cunt.

6 month from now CT will still be in London, sleeping rough. This is a cry for help that will go unheard.

If anyone’s going to “do a Mackem” in Trafalgar Square, it’ll be Tubs.

SJP'dYP

FYP

Botman leading the party behind the open top bus.

Yes

Ten Hag can ram this patter up his shit pipe. On the plus side, it's wonderful to hear that we're getting on the Man United manager's tits. I hope we put an absolute "ball in play time" clinic on on Sunday for the mayonnaise chip dipping cunt.

Case packed, nasal hair trimmed, lucky underpants washed and cheese and turnip sarnies made. London here I come baby! (although still awaiting Glooms address -PM me)

Plainly off to Villa next season after we sign that Georgian kid from Napoli

This is why my hotel is within 200 metres of Trafalgar Square

nah man, that's everyone walking back to mine after last orders

Hitler was doing it years ago, man.

This “ball in play time” …. It’s been introduced this season specifically for us hasn’t it? Can someone provide anything to contradict what this fuckin bald cloggie strap on is saying?…

i really hope we smash these cunts

we're definitely not that lucky

WAGS 1955 Had to use buses with sunroofs

Will you watch Sundays Final Top thread on their classy message board at the moment. Eight pages in less than three hours of course. Post #7: There’ll be a 100 page thread on the game by midday Sunday man

Absolutely brilliantly put.

I get the feeling we’re going to get at least initially “Eddie’s shithouse Mags” which probably means as Dave says possibly ASM & Isak on the bench. There’s about 3 positions up for grabs… Had a thought about Fraser…wonder if he’ll be invited to travel? Tbh he fuckin should be, because you can be sure that Anthony Gordon will be there poncing about with his Brookside 1987 haircut. If Fraser Isn’t there and Gordon is then I think it’s personal between Howe and “wee jock poo pong Mcplop” as he was known at school

There'll be a decent percentage of people wanting to fuck off who voted for all the shit we're now getting and who would gladly jettison and leave everyone to live with their mess. That's this country summed up.

This is funny from Ben Jennings of the Guardian. Took me a while to work out who the (lee)k was and why it was so cheap. And Sunak.

A couple of Miggy wonder goals would be just the ticket this weekend I can see it in the stars

you can't say he hasn't earned it. well done miggy! he's a more than useful player to have around, even as the squad grows, because of his pace and the effort he puts in to every appearance. so nice to see that effort rewarded with goals and assists this season - long may that continue!

Mods, admin, ban @Gemmill.

Maxi is shite as an impact sub. It's the fucking Cup final and Ten Hag's been making his goateed gob go. Go for it from the start.

These are the worst travel directions ever.

Explain in the secret forum please

it'll probably get the triple reload treatment at the dj gloom cup final after party

They’re going to let this cunt win aren’t they for a few million quid. It’s going to destroy the sport. Fair enough, set up some belts for the freaks and the former pros who want to take part in a new version of wrestling but don’t call it pro boxing ffs

The were 3 down when I went to bed. Safe to say this is not what I expected to see when I checked the score this morning. Brook is shaping up to be a superstar