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he'd miss the cup with a teabag.

Class performance by Sheff Wed. Totally deserved that

Hello Newcastle fans. Goodluck today..we are on a 14game unbeaten run so don't expect an easy game... Watch out for Dele bash in the middle with his pace and power. Callum Paterson who sounds like a drug dealer but is the master of running around angerily.. And Josh windass up top who just scored a hatrick.

Will be a tough evening for Isak. Not because he’s unfit or because they’ll target him but because he’s up top with Murphy and Ritchie Good luck, son

It’s not really about privacy, it’s about H & M being in control of their own narrative, not Piers fuckin Morgan. Harry has realised that his grandmother prevented not only his own father from marrying the woman he loved when he wanted to (meaning that if this had happened in the 70s when it should have he wouldn’t exist) but she also did it to her own sister previously. He also saw his fathers entire family & the snivelling servile flunkies they pay to keep them where they feel they should be treat his mother like a brood mare then promptly jettison her when she’d served this purpose (they are also the ones he’s chiefly fingering for his own wife’s unhappiness, not that am certain that she’s entirely blameless herself) Then he saw his mother chased to her death by grasping ghouls desperate to feed a media she had foolishly got into bed with herself at one point. Made to wander through the streets of London following her coffin with billions across the planet watching on before his bollocks had dropped, without as much as a comforting cuddle from his father apparently. Given all this no wonder he’s fucked up. He’s the one actually trying to be normal because the UKs deference to these fuckin sub normal twats definitely isn’t normal. His father and his brother are just going along with it as before, whistling away, “nothing to see here” and keeping their fingers crossed that the arseholes represented by THE GREAT BRITISH PUBLIC TM don’t tipple that they’re taking the fuckin piss and metaphorically chop their fuckin heads off. Harry has handled it badly though, but I suppose it was never going to be easy, trying to change 1000 years of arse kissing and patronage. But that’s where $2663478860000 worth of US style therapy gets you I suppose…get it all out there… The ball is now firmly in The Firm’s court. I expect nothing whatsoever of any significance will change at all though. Why should they change when they look at the crowds flocking to mourn a 96 yeah old harridan they’d never met who died of natural causes? They need to be made to take jobs, Charles can be a gardener for the National Trust, William can fly the people he wants to continue to kiss his arse until he pops his clogs to Majorca every summer, he’d suit the EasyJet uniform. His wife and step mother can run the local Sue Ryder and Oxfam shops, they’re definitely that type. I couldn’t give a fuck how the whole dysfunctional bastard tribe are viewed from abroad, they don’t have “magic”, all the have is a bunch of murderous rampantly ambitious ancestors who were even bigger cunts than the current crop. Power over anything significant needs to be removed from all of them. It’s fundamentally wrong that in the US & most of Europe any child born within a nation state’s borders can conceivably become the principle citizen of that country but in the UK and large parts of it’s fuckin “empire” that’s not possible, it’s reserved for one utterly dysfunctional family who are literally no better than any other fuckers family

Is there any danger that they can stop talking absolute fucking shite for five minutes? Why the fuck are they wittering on about extending a stadium they’ve barely sold out in fucking two decades, and are comfortably well under capacity currently. I swear they’re getting more and more deluded. What Newcastle fan would give a flying fuck about the capacity of their stadium? Whether it’s 30k or 150k is meaningless, they’d not fill the fucking thing (actual attendance not however they count it now), and they’d still be a fucking shite club. We’re fucking class you bunch of paedophile sympathizers whatever you lot do is a total fucking irrelevance, while I love to have a laugh at them this constant “eeee it’ll wyyyund the maggie coonts reyyyt up” is truly desperate and pathetic - to put it into context we’d have to have some sort of fucking disastrous second half of the season to not completely eclipse anything they did in the PL era and we’ve barely fucking got going under these new owners.

Have that Leicester

I’ve said it before but the fact that Anderson was the only young academy player even sniffing that squad today is a disgrace. These are games where, if you have a proper academy, you can throw some prospects in alongside the seasoned pros and give people a rest. The current crop are going to get nowhere. Another Ashley masterclass

I hope they make Chris Wood walk home the useless cunt

Have I said Murphy is also turbo shite?

Seeing Manquillo, Lascelles and Lewis in our back 4 is giving me horrible flashbacks.

Aye it's almost a certainty that Johnny Leagueonecloggerić is gonna boot him up his Swedish arse

Your mate's Spotify top play.....

Have you heard of the shift button?

Well done, mate. Fully deserved and you look a very well drilled unit. Best of luck for the rest of the season. You cunt

I blame Meenzer for giving up match thread starting duties.

CT backing the tactics truck up here. I'm all ears!

Absolute TUNE.

Replay for Liverpool is great news. Keep that fixture congestion up. Match will be played midweek for them, in between Brighton away and Chelsea at home - both already hard fixtures. How awful.

The Wood fee is simply what his release clause was. Burnley wouldn’t have sold him for a penny less. He did help keep us up but we don’t owe him anything in terms of giving him games. We’ve been unlucky with Isak as he hasn’t had injury issues in the previous three seasons. The reason we signed him is so Wood doesn’t have to play. Simple as. The management know he’s not good enough. He was just signed in exceptional circumstances because the club was in such a fucking state thanks to the previous regime.

Nope, 100% Gloom, he couldn’t even get the thread title the right way round, caused the imbalance that made Wood miss.

👏👏👏👏 well played old son good luck this season 👍

Chris Wood is to striker as Gloomy is to matchday thread starter. Fucking hopeless

Well played Wendy. Hope they go on to get promoted. Zero hard feelings against them tbh. Gonna be a wake up call for a lot of our fans tbh.

I'd say that's perfect timing to show the owners that this is what the second string looks like. Eddie has improved many but there are a lot of turds that can't be polished.

I never, ever want to see wood play for us again. ever. he is beyond shite. just fuck off. and take murphy with you.

What was the alternative though? Play largely the same team three times in a week? We are up against a League 1 side who this side should have been putting away easily. The only benefit from tonight is that it should make it very clear which players need to be part of the summer clear out.

Ritchie would struggle to get in the Sheff Wed side now

TOT is back baby!

We’ll write any poor cunt off after 45 minutes. He’s been out for 4 month, man

Murphy is fucking hopeless like. I’m patient when it comes to bringing in players but I really look forward to the day I don’t have to watch Murphy, Manquillo, Lewis etc

Murphy has just been running around, waiting to be tackled. Hook him at half time, the feckless cunt

Murphy has been dining out on those couple of games where he was half decent. I'm sick of seeing him take up a subs slot,.

Murphy 1v1 and pretty much just stops until another defender gets back to tackle him. These lot are League 1 FFS!

Longys tash must have blown off in the wind, no longer looking like a Falklands veteran.

Fuck me, scratch the surface of our squad and IT. IS. DOGSHIT.

Lewis looks petrified every time he sets foot on the pitch.

Howay always sums these Six Fingered perverts up so well 😂

Netflix paying dividends again.... I thought the Afghan's clinging to the planes was desperate but it wasn't quite MLF desperate.

On some of the old school footage of semi finals (NUFC vs Burnley?) there was on end that looked just like a hill at a music festival. Same amount of flairs too

Saved you a word

Why doesn't it surprise me in the slightest that CT can't be arsed to read subtitles

aye, was at that one too, remember it was that fucking cold queueing up at cardiff station afterwards they were handing out silver foil jackets to ward off hypothermia. like the welsh constabulary I do, think they were telling man utd supporters they had none left.

I love the idea that they’ve concocted in which people are travelling to see Sunderland off the back of that documentary Because when I watched Tiger King, the first thing I did was book up for the Joe Exotic Memorial Tour

He did but couldn't get it off the ground!