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There ends Toontastic's official period of mourning.

You get a CT 'best of' recipe pamphlet. Have fun.

Craig'dKK'sQ

One of my dad’s best pals was a jambo and I remember going to a preseason friendly at Tynecastle between Hearts and Newcastle in the late 80s (may have been early 90s). I think it may have had something to do with the John Roberston transfer. Anyway, the subs were warming up at half time and one the balls went into the sparsely populated away end, triggering a roughly 20 v 20 kickabout on the terraces. If anyone can beat that for the dullest anecdote about Heart of Midlothian then I’ll send you £5.

Your Radfords and your Viallis

Pearson's in deep shit if he has to pronounce this lads name:

If Dummet's old nickname was 'sick note' his new one should be 'Death Certificate' by now, tbh.

Rattled, they’re currently 5th, in a brand new billion pound stadium, and spent a wedge in the summer. I think it’s starting to dawn on these cunts that Eddie’s radgies aren’t going anywhere

I think he can't speak English properly, but I concede that if they were bigger and better than us, they would be bigger and better than us.

😂 I was at the Cardiff Millennium stadium game against Manure and we were stood in this square before the game having a pint, along about 2-300 other Geordies. There was a couple of coppers there, having a bit laugh with everyone as it was all good natured drunkenness. Two Manure fans came around the corner next to us and you see the cogs turning as they realised where they were, but their legs were still taking them forward. Some daft lad leaned over and said something to the effect of “ Alreet lads, do you want a beer?” Daft twats, with huge relief on their faces, said “Yes please” In Les than 15 seconds they were totally drenched in beer and looking like drowned rats. Coppers were stood there pissing themselves as the masses ushered them on their way with a few more pints on the head to keep them going.

Everton winning would be fantastic on all fronts, it would be Man “United” out of the cup and Lampard remaining in charge to keep Everton in the relegation zone.

Fuckin Castore man

FYP

Rattling them up nice and early! Eddie 'the Rattlesheikh' Howe!

Here’s your cake, courtesy of CT:

FYP

Even the Knight was on the Stella that day.....

i think they're still spending the Coutinho money, so don't expect it to stop anytime soon.

my favourite post for a while. simply because you casually described spurs as a small club 🙂

When we lost to them in the FA Cup semi at the old Wembley the Newcastle fans were at the tunnel end. As well as the Newcastle team we gave Chelsea and Vialli a great ovation. He hung around a fair while applauding our fans. To be honest, I don’t think he could believe the reception, given we’d lost despite being the superior side on the day. We still reminded Graeme Rix he was a paedophile though

Poor bastard indeed, never came across as a cunt which is some going considering some of the clubs, (ok, Chelsea), he played for and managed. Pretty sure him and Zola made a thing about applauding our fans at Wembley in the semi-final at Wembley, (Zola even gave a NUFC fan his shirt iirc) as they went down the tunnel as they recognised how well we played that day and how brilliant the supporters were that day compared to the Henley Regatta Tory crew at the other end of the stadium.

I'm hoying an absolute wobbler if we don't get top 4 lads. So start fucking preparing yourselves now.

I know fuck all about Sheff Wed, but have they got it in them to be clogger dickheads if they go behind? If so, let's keep the crown jewels for emergency situation. I'm thinking Bruno and Wilson, possibly Almiron. We could maybe give Schar a rest and let Lascelles have a turn. Botman will kick his fucking head in if he does anything daft. Joelinton is unbreakable, so we don't need to worry about playing him. Trippier takes no shit off anyone unless they stamp on his feet. Drop Joelinton back into midfield, stick ASM and Fraser on the wings, and BRING OUT THE PLANK. A start for Christopher Reginald Wood. Then bring the jewels back to knack Leicester.

I reckon that if they had richer owners, a better history, had a larger global profile, a bigger fanbase, had played loads more than us in Europe, had the more attractive city, had better players, were above us in the league and looked to be in a much better state going forward then they could probably argue they were the bigger club.

I was at that game, right next to the tunnel tbh. Him, Zola and Poyet seemed genuinely blown away by their reception from us as they left. I’m sure one of them chucked their shirt in to our lot too. Leaving the ground after I remember saying to a Chelsea lad “ Cheer up man, you’s fucking won!” because he looked utterly miserable… … which might’ve been because he was surrounded by thousands of pissed-up raucous Geordies, but hey-ho.

Wolverhampton Space Invaders.

Quite fuckin right too

'What are the benefits of Brexit?'

Don't bother weighing myself. The mirror tells me I'm fat. 🙁

You’re right about that goal. The noise when it went in was primeval… RIP Vialli, read an article about him once apparently he was from a wealthy background, think it said he was brought up in a castle When he was coming through at Sampdoria Souness joined from Liverpool and corrupted him into the wicked ways of drinking beer for 12 hours solid etc etc think Mancini was a young player there too, Souness was apparently a big influence on both of them..

Were you there too? I think Rob Lee’s goal might’ve been my favourite single moment in football. Absolute fucking bedlam when that went in

yeah, madison is the game-changer statement signing. i think we also need a ball-playing number 6. i'm not sure tielemens is that player. i think he's more of a longstaff upgrade. my only concern with him is whether he can do the work required off the ball to fit into howe's system, but if we get him i'll trust their judgement

FYP

Whoops, I didn’t read the title and figured incorrectly that this was the league cup QF. I stand down from my official position on the forum is what I'd be saying now if I had a position.

I think it’s inevitable that our form will dip a little bit but so will Man United and Spurs are up and down like your ma’s kegs. our goal difference is ridiculous as well, if it’s as tight as it seems, that’s an extra point

Rather than a shitty club from a shitty town with backward fans playing in a run down dump and owned by a mammy's boy and a couple of chancers🤣

@Howayone of your favourites getting trashed. Hasselbaink intervening to disagree and ending up saying "I don't think he doesn't WANT to defend.... He's just not a good defender."

Poor lad, no one told him it was a Newcastle match

Even worse than Nigel Farage's record in general elections. Impressive.

Can’t be arsed trawling back to see if was mentioned, but a certain sunderland mp* was on the national news yesterday giving Sunak pelters. *giddup!