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Nice screenshot with the fucking volume bar right through it, granddad.

Dropped my daughter off in Wallsend high street for work. I had zero expectations and they were met.

We know, CT's been tracking your flight.

"Where are we going to, Lee?" "Get doon to DFDS ferries in North Shields, wor kid. Me snout reckons he's coming from Amsterdam."

Asked the Southampton fans about them -

The agony they must feel at every false dawn is... I can't find a better word than delicious. They get a billionaire who backs them to the hilt, but Short fucks it up. They get a clean financial slate and their new owners are engaging with the fans and one is even a PR person!!! but the pair fuck it up. They're 'bought' by a billionaire, but he doesn't actually own them outright, and even if he did, it's trust fund money and not really his own. Two consecutive relegations, lowest league finish in their history, 4 seasons in the third tier, two failed play-off chances, a team of nobodies managed by a nobody owned by nobodies. Now they're in the second tier with one of the lowest valued squads and they're talking about promotion like it's a serious possibility. All the while they're proclaiming some intangible superiority to their erstwhile rivals who are owned by people staggering wealth, managed by a respected coach, entertained by English and Brazilian internationals. Like I said, delicious.

So accounts like this put up a picture of Ekitike laughing with his agent, they unanimously decided he was taking the piss out of Newcastle - despite nothing to suggest that - and a load of our fans went and gave him a load of abuse in the comments 🙄. Fucking idiots, so they’ll go way over the top to thank a player and call him a world beater who was utter dogshit for years like Hayden to, I assume, show how amazing they are but when the club is in negotiations with one of the premier up and coming striker talents in football they do this? I’m sure the club will be thrilled.

It's finally struck me what this reminds me of. You can hear her saying it, can't you.....? THEEEYYRA NORR IN THE PREMYA LEAGUHE, WEE ARGH!!

don't knock it yer twat it's took me five fucking years to get that far!

Leave sectarianism out of this, Wykiki.

Superb. Jamal, get your bags packed bonny lad.

There's a youtube video called SVEN BOTMAN IS TOO MUCH BEAST. "TOO MUCH BEAST" is all I want to hear from the crowd when he puts a crunching tackle in. Wor Flags need to get on it too. TOO MUCH BOT!

No pun intended

CT trying to walk out the gym after his first PT session.

No need, the story on there goes like this; " the delewded cunts thowt they wuh gonna syun Mbappe, now it's some Chelsea reyject" " Ee wohun't syun for them man, ee's got moruls" " Ee's syuning for them? Just shows ee's got no moruls" " Broja is shite man, ee couldn't mack it at Chelsea and ee was shite at bottom half Southampton, ee'll be a flop" " Whee gives a shite abowut the Gerlden boowut man, Sewpa Kev got more and the gerlies weren't shite liyuk they are now. "

Wilmslow; Hottest thing was the coffee, most midriff was shown by a builder, who also had the biggest tits.

Relieved I wore the perv shades in the City on this glorious Friday lunchtime

Him and Sue Smith. Separated at birth like Luke Skywalker and Princess Leia if Luke and Leia were gnomes.

"FTM!!!!!"

If nothing else, this has absolutely underlined the fact that you don't win elections by humping bairns.

There’s not a day goes by when I miss RobW

CT 🤝 Meenzer

Can we add Milan to the list? You can stick your seven European Cups up your arse.

Dominating the airwaves Interrupting tonight’s episode of Amsterdam Eastenders like Diana has died again

I’d assumed that it had closed down years ago. Trust you to know otherwise

As much as I enjoy the banter, I do believe there is a place for truth in discourse, and I am not ashamed of that. I do get things wrong. I would like to add this though: Just came across it by chance tbf

I've resisted watching any Botman YouTube compilations. What a Friday night for my lass. She'll be begging me to put guitar pedal review videos on by 9pm.

You'll be thankful it's him and not her when your arsehole prolapses at the squat rack.

I demand to know what Labour are going to do about it

🎶Well, the fat bastards come in these places And the fat twats are all the same You don't look at their faces And you don't ask their names You don't think of them as human You don't think of them at all You keep your mind on the money Keeping your eyes on the wall I'm your private trainer A trainer for money I'll do what you want me to do I'm your private trainer A trainer for money And any old push ups will do I wanna make a million quid I wanna live out by the sea Have a husband and some children Yeah, I guess I want a family All the fat bastards come in these places And the fat twats are all the same You don't look at their faces And you don't ask their names I'm your private trainer A trainer for money I'll do what you want me to do I'm your private trainer A trainer for money And any old sit ups will do. 🎵

I don’t class myself as ITK in any way, shape, or form but I’m related to a club scout and hear bits here and there. Only reason I’m posting this is because that’s how I know the transfer activity is now completely restricted to Ashworth, Howe, and Nickson (I imagine some higher ups too) - so these ITK twitter accounts know absolutely fuck all, I used to half think maybe they heard bits like I did but they’re completely full of it. Little bits get passed about to scouts and this is the other reason I’m passing a long as it meshes with the ‘patience’ talk, I’d heard about a week before things started emerging that our three keeper targets were Areola, Pope, and Leno in that order - they were advanced with Areola and the bid went in but he started asking for a lot of money so they went for Pope and signed him as we all know. The key part for me was when watching the interview with him he mentioned that there’d been discussions for weeks & that he’d been speaking to Trippier a lot about it, before everything suddenly happened quickly - this was all before we’d given up on Henderson and Areola. While this makes sense that we have contact with all these back up targets and are working on them as we proceed with top targets it’s just nice to know it really is happening now whereas in January I think we really were focusing on one target at a time. Again, I know nowt really - especially now - short of some youth players we’ve scouted

have you been on rtg to ask the mackems what they think of him yet?

I might* have had a smidgen of sympathy for them if they hadn’t acted like such small-time goons when we were (briefly) relegated. * actually, I wouldn’t … ever.

Elf-like beige cunt Lee Hendrie was on SSN saying Sunderland had every chance of being in the mix. Seemingly based on nothing bar them being a premier league club relatively recently

Memories la la la la laaaah

Aye, this weather can be a double-edged sword if, like me, you used to work next to Shields Road

This video has aged well. Literally the opposite of EVERYTHING that was promised has happened!

Aye- whereas previously they had 4 absolute whoppers with no money in charge, now they’ve only got 3 absolute whoppers with no money in charge. Rome wasn’t skint in a day, and that.

I was just thinking that. Somehow the thread has been derailed from glorious sunshine fanny to potentially dead ex-posters?

It's the tour de France soon - drug cheat post from beyond the grave incoming.

It's not FFP that's limiting our spend, it's strategy. We could blow our wad this window and spend a couple hundred million without falling foul of FFP. I think it's prudent not to for a couple of reasons. The kind of spend that would get us into the CL conversation is huge and we're currently unlikely to attract the level of player that would return on that investment immediately. If we were in West Ham's position and 3-4 £50m players would secure CL, it would make sense for us to do it. If we splurge big in our first summer window under new ownership, it would set the tone that we're a big spending team and the Newcastle tax would be huge every window, regardless of our league position. If we spend £200m this window, that would impact FFP down the line unless we pull in huge sponsorship deals. It's my view that there's a pot we're happy to spend from, but it's more than £60m. I mean, we've already spent £24m on a LB and a 'keeper we're talking about £30m for Botman and similar for Ekitike, so that's £90m. I think if we were to sign those two players and then someone like Paqueta became available at a reasonable price, we'd spend on him too.

Good summary on exactly why the RMT are striking. Stick it on your Facebook in response to anyone complaining about their journey times. Obviously I'm not on FB but you basic bitches will be.

Are you apologising for someone else now?

That's HMHM mate. C'mon Fish, you're better than this.