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F U C K I N G

Alan Smith 'It's not over yet' Honestly man, have you injected heroin into your eyes you fucking noce.

Goes well with 6 pints of Lloyd Grossman Lamb Bhuna, so I'm told.

She lives in a house where people eat cabbage carbonara. I'm sure she's well accustomed to rolling thunder.

Ayy look who’s come back just in time to not be back anymore.

Fucking jacket!!! Southern ponce.

Eddie Howe finally beating Steve Bruce’s points total from last season.

CT will be getting a micro-chub at every bloke he spots wearing a jacket when he gets his binoculars out and scans the crowd.

Enoch2.0.

CT 💯 doing air guitar to this.

Carragher: Newcastle are gonna be a real problem for Arsenal next season. Seems like people are waking up to the fact that we're properly on the march now.

In 5 month, we’ve beat just about the entire bottom half, got results against most of the top half and have now pissed on the chips of Arteta and his PROJECT. Pacqueta, Phillips and some £45 million mad dog striker to come in the summer. Good luck everyone else

Absolutely brilliant that. Hope we fucking hammer Burnley to cap the season off - I genuinely don’t care who goes down anymore none of them will be near us from next year I’m sure of it. If we invest well, the way Howe has us playing we stand a good chance of getting a European spot imo. None of the sides chasing it have any consistency/good enough management for us to fear them.

Wilson playing like a man who knows we are buying a striker

Sun’s out after pissing down all day. Gloomy walking in to the Trent …

This thread is equal to the Gazza one. Whenever I see that someone has posted in it, I fear that some more food has died a horrible death.

The look of pure contempt on that dog's face.

jokes aside, I’m half tempted to check out those gigantic jugs of joy at the Trent - see if they’re all they’re cracked up to be. (Not yours, obvs)

Speaking of South West London, I saw the lesser spotted Jeff Hendrick in Fulham yesterday. All that money and he looked like a fucking tramp, scruffier than William Storey.

I see the "P" in "iPhone" is capitalised. Interesting....

It’s barely rained for the past month and it’s nice the rest of the week too. Absolutely on you this like, Gloomy

Real men move to Scotland because Newcastle is too warm and dry.

Gemmill unmasked by Coldwar Steve !!!

Remember when we got taken over by PIF and the boys and we all dreamed about good times but there was always that doubt that we’d Newcastle it up and there wouldn’t be good times and it would all go west? Crisis well and truly swerved Here we fucking go

Shout out to CT: it's 12 points now but it'll be a lot closer come the end of the season, etc, etc.

Those flags look fucking excellent well done Wor Flags

I guarantee your dog doesn't get walked on days like this. Back door opened, you in your crocs picking turds up.

#southernfairy

Ive only missed two home matches this calender year. Leicester, which i watched in a pub, and Liverpool, which i missed entirely. Almost forgotten what it feels like to lose at home. Tonight was brilliant. The flags, the atmosphere, and for me the inevitable certainty of victory from the start. We're going places. The bad time are over.

“I can’t really talk, my fucking tooth come out!” https://www.nufc.co.uk/nufc-tv/latest-videos/wilson-what-a-performance/

Did anyone else hear Trippier coaching our lot as he was warming up on the touch line? Telling them where to drop in etc. Born leader that one, surely our next captain?

If he didn’t have to concentrate so much on breathing the thick cunt might have noticed that in the prior fifteen years. They’re all going to be coming out with platitudes like that going forward, trying to get us all on side as we continue to piss on their collective chips. They’ll keep acting confused when toon fans tell them to boil their heads, just remember the absolute nonsense you’s leveled at us in the past. Even fucking now pundits being collectively baffled when Souness brought us up as one of the biggest clubs ever relegated, but sure lads perennially mid table Everton are massive.

I know we’ve got other things to celebrate tonight, but hats off to this lad- 17yr old Blackpool forward Jake Daniels who is the first openly gay pro player in mens football for over 30 years. He will, inevitability, get some stick, but I have nothing but admiration for the lad, balls of fucking steel. https://www.bbc.co.uk/sport/football/61467159

Home form will be imperious next year. If the away form is anywhere close, it’s going to be a total domination of 75% of the shit in this league. Hurricane Howe is coming, board the windows up

The players have only just left the pitch apparently. CT finally got his mathematically safe party and he turned up with a 6 pint, two-day old hangover.

"£8.5 MILLION POUNDS!"

Wow. Fucking wow. Even über-fucking über-wow. If this was the teaser then bring it on. I haven’t enjoyed watching a football match this much since SBR!

Arsenal: shite. These Sky boys better get used to giving us credit because we are going to rip the piss next season

I reckon the ATM will see plenty of action in the summer

If this is what Howe is planning for next season, only with better players, time to fire up the wanking spanners

Joe is the one with the Player of the Season trophy in his pocket

Nice of your daughter to send you that picture so you can lie to the mean boys on the internet and make out like you do take the dog out for a walk sometimes.

I blame Bill Gates.