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I'll get you started: TAKE A LOOK AT E HOWE

'Cause Wood's running into space But ASM finding him is against all odds At least Schär's got a nice face

Aye he wanted to manage the rarely done, yet still possible, double destroy and exit in a season. Seems like the WBA owners have thwarted his plans and his summer holiday to Benidorm will be cut to only the end of pre-season. Pulled out all the stops with this one too, brought in his son Alex whose only talent is that his GCSE results spell out FUDGE.

This in the replies

Fuck me! That looks like Cissie’s daughtersister

Great stuff. I don’t think I’ll ever stop despising Man Utd

That fucking music is shite mind, but it’s from Romeo and Juliet, a story about a lad’s love for a thirteen year old lass…so…aye.

Wee Phillie vs Shaun Middleton! Yeeeeeeas!

I won't have a bad word said about Dave the Rave! https://www.facebook.com/630095805/posts/10157580817055806/?d=n

I'm expecting a hiding to be honest.

Aye, we should have kept Hendrick to lay them on for him like at Burnley

That would be great but I want instant gratification. Wednesday beat them 3 nil in the league earlier this year so that would do me. I assume away goals don't count double nowadays as well? Another trip to Wembley, taking Trafalgar square, diving into 18 inch fountains, generaly showing themselves to be mutants, and then losing to the mighty Wycombe wanderers on penalties would also do.

That goal shouldn’t count, they bought him in January and going by everyone’s reaction about us that’s surely not allowed.

Send them S Longstaff next season

I posted that fight on here from YouTube a little while back. While the standard is not very good that doesn’t stop him being comfortably outclassed or prevent him from losing every round

Have you seen him fighting? He looks like fucking Gimli The fight is here, but don’t bother- it’s as shite you’d expect.

Shaun reporting on the great atmosphere which isn't quite great enough to stop you from picking out individual conversations.

Brucies boys putting on a show in a dead rubber against the bottom team. He knows when to get a result.

Moving the goalposts I see. You’re becoming like Leazes. You’re lucky Ant isn’t here to infect your computer with spyware

Starting to think that the funniest outcome would be their promotion and subsequent wild celebrations only for it to be followed by a humiliating season of defeats. Them ending up back in League One would be outstanding. Just that little sliver of hope extinguished in an instant

Nearly 500 in the end and it’s still being called a ‘mixed set results for the two main parties’ on the ITV news this evening. What a fucking joke Pestyn and co are, man

3-0 to Brighton, a VAR check for a 4th going on Given! HAHAHHAHA

Different gravy, that lad.

Bring Karen so I can spark her out in all, gan on Middleton you toothless wonder. What’s it with mackems and immediately on about fighting btw? RTG is obsessed with it “might have lost 8-0 marras but we kicked those 14 year olds in at the train station so we won the war”. Thick cunts.

Sorry but Steve Bruce is gone. You’ll have to make do with 70% possession and a three goal victory.

Gandaft as Shaun’s cornerman

Boro losing 4-1 now

Saying that, I'm sure when you're closing in on the title and the margins are this thin, I'm sure you see bogeymen in every upcoming opponent. I wouldn't fucking know unfortunately.

Aye, I can’t really see much else than a backlash. Jonjo will be out there in flip flops, and factor 500 all ready for Dubai.

I think you'll be fine. If you were the sort of team to sulk or go missing after results like that, you wouldn't be the sort of team that wins things. I'm hoping for the sulk but it seems much more likely we'll face a backlash and get humped.

We've seen all this before. I want to see them break new ground. As we’re having our first enjoyable season in about a decade with a team full of exciting young talent helmed by a talented young coach, I want the duality of them being filled with cast-offs and journeymen, getting walloped by Millwall under the helm of a bloke who looks about 15 years older than he actually is. For 4 month until it turns rotten in the stands and he’s replaced with the next poor sod. Culminating in a nasty relegation. Maybe throw in some more calamity at board room level, Billy Storey possibly getting some level of ownership, Keane knocking them back again, that’s good cooking. I’d even welcome Pickford just to melt their brains

Amazing

He’s dropped a right bollock there

The state of that 11.

I can't fucking stand 'Pep', Klopp is a pain in the arse as well but he slightly pips pep in the likeability stakes. I couldn't give a shit who wins the PL out of the two although as the Liverpool game has now gone then I hope we stop Man City as it's it's all about NUFC. I prefer watching Liverpool out of the two clubs but that's just more of their attacking style that I find easier on the eye. I prefer both clubs to Man U and Chelsea so hopefully that brings some solace, (as if he'll need it!) to London blue.

OIL WARS!