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Fuckin good job too...its my birthday Monday, this arrived at lunchtime via Amazon from my sister in law

Disgraceful treatment, doesn't he know the ref has a family?

"Well diary, it isn't just high profile failure managers who get to have a break during the football season, ah fancied a little downtime meself and the stars collided like that time big battling Billy Whitehurst collided with silky Paul Bracewell's knee! Me mam said she was going away to wa caravan in Haggerston castle and did ah fancy driving her up as she had a sore leg herself? Ah said why not and stayed ower forra night. Ah got the auld dear sorted oot and then ah did the only thing ah could really and that was to hit the mahogany at the site bar. Ah gans in and says "pint of moretti, chief" as ah fancied the good stuff. "Wiv anny got fosters and Carli....fuck me! Are you alreet, Lee?" Christ! It was only 'Nervous Nelly', Paul Nelson, one of me old mates! Poor cunt got his name as he pissed himself once when he was arseholed and we let on some gadgie offered him on and he pissed himself, lol, he never knew and it stuck! Anyways after many jars that night he said ahll the visitors were fucking off to Berwick forra pint instead of the bar he was running and he thought it was in danger of shutting doon! Still nervous to this day, ah thought! "Looka, Nelly, calm doon, kidda, the Knight's on the fucking case wor kid, ah'l see what ah can dee, ah'm a high profile celebrity in the toon." After that he calmed right doon. The punter's champion never forgets his people. Lol, laters.

Literally the opposite of the actual reason but ok

The Mirror are saying we've opened talks with Overmars about being the director of football, and that he'd want to take the current Ajax coach Erik ten Hag with him as the new coach. As I've said I'm very impressed with what Overmars has done at Ajax in terms of finding players, keeping the albeit already legendary Ajax youth system ticking over, and the amount of profit he made for Ajax from players he found that were sold on. ten Hag I'm less sure about given how badly de Boer did at Inter and Palace, although in fairness he wasn't given a lot of time at either. Coming from the Dutch league whether you're a player or coach can be hit or miss. You can be a Suarez or Kezman. But the point I'm making about de Boer and ten Hag is that it's very easy to look great in basically a two team league with most of the best players. Of course I think I'm right in saying that ten Hag's team has been a fair bit more impressive in Europe than de Boer's team. I mean it could be the dream team if it worked out given they presumably already have a great working relationship, which of course is what you want and need between a DOF and coach. As I've said I'm not convinced by Fonseca even though it could be argued that his CV is a bit more impressive given he's been at a number of big clubs in comparison to ten Hag's Utrecht and Ajax. It should also be said that ten Hag is also an attacking coach who likes to play a high pressing and possession game, which it could be argued is a style of play that is beyond many of the players in our current squad. I can't give a reason backed up with facts, but I just get the feeling ten Hag would be the more solid choice. I mean if only for the fact that's already been stated, that he already has a working relationship with Overmars, and they could perhaps create what they did at Ajax with us, but on a much bigger scale.

The big clubs get all the decisions

Oh noes

That can't be the real owner's test, can it?

This team for the last two years has changed from a well drilled squad to a bunch of playstation playing wankers. Yet that's just overlooked by Bruce's pals. The cunts

Howay the var. Commentators fucking devastated.

Thank you for your assistance.

Crystal Meth v PCP Must now see an improvement in attitude, anything else is a bonus.

As a left wing troll I take exception to this.

The Athletic has an article where their writers pick who we “should” be going for and it’s the most football hipster list I’ve ever seen Some bloke managing in Serie B and Xabi Alonso, current manager of Real Sociedad B are particular highlights.

Everyone back to Haggerston for pints at Nervous Nellys.

It was a clear and obvious foul, Vieira should be confronting two people, whichever player of his was pulling the shirt, and Benteke for not already finishing the game off.

I missed it- I just nipped out to murder some Yemenis and kill a few journalists.

If we get a point here it should definitely be chalked up in the shithousing it column.

What have they got against Jimmy Carr?

Can I suggest Gallowgate Flags’ next effort is a 50ft rendition of “ Lick Iz!”

Both. Bruce has allowed them to become part time footballers.

Without going into Jordan’s crap track record at running a club, he also called Staveley a rat, accused her of deluding people, and many other things, I can’t see the loud mouthed orange prick being top of Staveley’s list just because he’s decided to start licking our arse.

I haven't read it and I still think it's a bad idea

I’ve read that twice and I still think it’s a bad idea

Unofficial Transfer embargo in the manner implied borders on breaches of a cartel anti competition law. I think it’s more likely they realise this is a golden opportunity to shift some overpaid players who can’t break into their first team at inflated costs and turn a good profit. Business will trump some emotional sporting reaction 9 times out of ten. We won’t be competing with the big boys for multiple years, by which point the players we sign now will have been replaced/retired/sold.

Every native born inhabitant of Tyneside born between 1960 & 1985 has stayed at either Haggerston Castle or the Riverside camp site at Wooler. It’s the law, you don’t get your Geordie passport without getting a stamp from one of them

@Monkeys Fist

Why should we listen to the mackem?

I've probably said this before but anytime Bruce spouted pish about retaining his dignity I always thought of Rafa's time at Chelsea. Understood why he was hated, took the abuse on the chin and got on with the job with minimal fuss. Probably even changed a few folks opinions of him in the process for the better. The mad cunts gone and done it again too taking that Everton job. For all Ashley's failings, letting Rafa walk for Bruce is right up there. Telling that Rafa was rumoured to be the new owners favoured choice.

Still hate Chelsea tbf, but it's got fuck all to do with their owners and everything to do with their fanbase. Other than that I agree entirely.

as i missed the game, how did we play? did it look much different to how bruce had them 'playing'? oh and #rafaout is trending on twitter.. obviously the media will come out and defend rafas honour and make out that the fans are horrible cunts for hounding him like they did with bruce right??

With regard the supposed turnaround about the Arabic dress I think the distinction is that people wear traditional dress, as opposed to a dirty old tea towel and an inflatable camel. I presume that way it could be seen as an homage, as opposed to a parody of their culture.

Wilson you fucking sexy bastard.

Can't wait till January comes around and we're told who we're allowed to sign.

Are BUJ and TOT playing? I'll solve this mystery Guess Who? style.

https://www.instagram.com/p/CVWEd9gs5NG/?utm_medium=copy_link New fitness coach.

Nah.Read it again.It makes sense.Mandy cannot run the show on her own,and we don’t want a yes man/yes woman advising.We need someone with past connections to the club.

spot on mate. well, I think it is. maybe we'll all wake up in a day or two and it'll dawn on us we've lost a national treasure? I honestly don't expect such an outpouring of grief when david attenborough departs this mortal coil.

Does the outdoor centre at Hexham count?

Just seen this..... Life really imitating art here, mind.

What a fine example of a multicultural community.

In the Gallowgate next to Jackie Milburn, Blair and CT.

Well this was worth leaving for.