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An antiquated rule from a time where MPs were expected to be reasonably honest and have the honour to come to the house and apologise when they'd mislead it. Unfortunately those rules didn't allow for this particular shower of cunts.

I agree the target himself is underwhelming, I just mean if we are to go for him it’s pretty pathetic being outbid by Nice. Absolute fucking zombie club.

Ellie from Wolf Alice is amazing....she has the most delicate but hugely powerfully live vocal. Felt a tiny bit emotional last night, hadnt realised I'd missed live music so much...

The Praetorian Guard happily doing the bidding of the latest emperor until they don't get the pay rise they want then of course they turn on that emperor.

It’s all about “value” or something. At times like these I expect Charnley sits under his desk sucking his thumb until the phone stops ringing..

For the people of dundee

Finished laying the new garden lawn this afternoon. Thats the entire house, extension and garden finished. Never moving house again. Until I get put into a home

The NZ basketball team are called the Tall Blacks....this is next level though..

It’s here, baby. Last time out in Rio, we had mugging and barely constructed stadiums. This time, COVID is cutting through the Olympic Village like nothing seen since the great STD outbreak of 82 (probably). We’ve got Baseball, Softball and Karate because the Asians are fucking mad for it and skateboarding is in because it has great potential for serious bodily harm which puts it above boring Tory shit like Equestrian. Team GB are going for a canny few, I imagine. We’ll probably dope our way to the bikes again, bit of long jump and probably the horse dancing but everything is on at a stupid time so nobody will watch it anyway. Either way, enjoy the game

Supporters have until 5pm on Friday, 23rd July to renew their season tickets ahead of Newcastle United’s 2021/22 Premier League campaign. Ah fuck I missed it

I didn't think there'd be anybody that could pick a fight with Patel and have me rooting for her

What are you in about this time, dungeon master?

Best viewed flat out in the garden, ABBA blasting, spackered on Lidl wiessbier?

Can't say I'm fussed about signing another relegated loser

Nothing a cherry tomato on your top won’t solve.

We're just gearing up for a move to another rental place, because we're not ready to leave London yet but we definitely can't afford to buy the kind of thing we'd want here either. I'm happy to report that most estate agents and a good handful of removal companies are still cunts. Very much looking forward to moving into a place of our own in a few years, getting set up and not fucking moving a muscle again until the merciful release of death.

Starmer should have done something like that if he wanted some cut through.

We're having a Q&A about returning to the office (phased, no pressure) and some stupid twat has asked how soon can we have a huge piss-up to celebrate the return. Far too polite a reply from the head cheese.

It was Renton who lent me the DVDs tbf.

Just googled her...she's no Peta Cavendish tbh

Spot on, the same people screaming sports washing at Saudi Arabia are helping Qatar with their own brand of it. They’re as bad as each other, do these people honestly think Qatar just sits on its hands doing fuck all to Saudi Arabia? As that’s the way it’s often portrayed which is exactly what Qatar wants. Saudi Arabia are probably the biggest and the baddest, but they’re kidding themselves if they honestly want to act like the ruling families in the other surrounding countries are shining beacons of humanity. Like you say, I’m all for a higher standard being applied but then we need to deal with the heavy ties to Qatar, UAE, and Russian mobsters at the top of the game just as much as blocking Saudi Arabia. We’re going to now act aghast at this type of phone hacking, yet when Liverpool did it to Manchester City’s scouting system it was largely met with a collective shrug. Of course there’s a part of me that would absolutely love this lot to come in and blow through fortunes getting NUFC to the top of the game, but more of me wants fucking rid of Mike Ashley and that’s what’s getting completely lost on a lot of these arseholes who constantly have pops at the fan base. Meanwhile we have to sit and watch Manchester United fans get applauded for storming their ground and getting a game cancelled before their owners buy Jadon Sancho and give Rafael Varane 500k a week. If these guys want to talk morals and fairness that’s fine, so let’s level the playing field and introduce hard caps on yearly salary and transfer spends, spread the TV money through the entire pyramid so that the lowest levels of the game don’t have to struggle financially all the time, that’s not what they want though they just want the current clubs at the top to remain there while they shrug and trot out lazy stereotypes about the rest of the teams. Until there’s some type of fair reporting on the fucking horrors committed by Qatar, and all the fucking shit that they do behind the curtain, it’s not fair of them to attack NUFC fans who want a deal with SA to happen.

If you haven't already, start contributing even a small amount monthly to the 1892 pledge because they way things are going it's going to help save the club in a few years time when we're at the mackem's stage. It doesn't have to be this way and it's easily avoided but as a wise man once said, if you keep poking a tiger with a stick it'll bite you and Ashley's gambles don't always pay off for him. If two of the promoted clubs come up full of spunk for their first year up we're in serious trouble as there's only Leeds from last year who were newly promoted and I think they'll be ok for the 2nd season syndrome. Again, we're going to have get ahead of the likes of Brighton etc and hope at least two of the promoted teams struggle. Bored shitless with it and you try to not let it bother you but it does. Imagine going into a new season with a bit of enthusiasm and hope? It's been far, far too long we've experienced it. Seeing the shit in the past and then seeing us realise our potential just to get into this fucking clip through the spiv who owns us is heartbreaking for anyone with a love of our club.

He thought he saw an empty vessel in Johnson that he could mould as he wished. What I don't think he reckoned with was just how pussy whipped Johnson was.

I give a shit, but my expectations are so low so that there's no way I can be disappointed. Fanx Mike, fanx EPL!