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You all should have used a condom. Miles cheaper

Sounds like you might have done some damage to yourself thinking about this neighbour. 👀

Well we haven’t learnt WHY he was bitten three times, have we? Probably dangling a bit of steak in front of the poor dog’s chops. ”Bet you haven’t seen one of these before have you, you mackem bastard?! Wheeze steyuk is this, haha! Eh you mackem mutt?! Arggh the fucking dog’s bit me, it’s radge!”

I wouldn't waste any more money on sports stuff, mate. Comics and Doritos, that's what you need to budget for.

'RIP to the man who once inspired a generation to get his award by camping and using a compass near Rothbury in the days of the mighty Quinn and THAT side that came up short of a trip to Wembley via the play offs. Lol. Laters. (And once again, rest in peace to the Duke who'll be meeting Joe Harvey once again like he did in NUFC's fifties heyday.')

I'd have liked to have seen her 20 years ago.... she's soooooo posh, I quite often curtsey when I see her in the street....am also very enamoured with the various 20 something African fellahs that she's introduced us to, one lad told me all about Accra and how much he loved Marcel Desailly

It's the "Mad Mistake" bit that got me. wouldn't be all that surprised if it's his actual birth name.

stop holding back, tell us how you really feel. you're in a safe space <group hug>

Inmates

I’ve got 104 friends

The wife across the road from us (57, single mother to teenage son, ex model, ex soho bar owner, goes "riding out" etc etc 🙄) has two gigantic fuckin staffies who happen to be just about the loveliest dogs I've ever come across...one of them collided with car a couple of years back and literally caused more damage to the motor than it did to itself

And now he’s just like his dad 😛

Fist Jnr. saw two of them, and laughed his cock off, the little bastard.

'Immanent Announcement Monthly'

richard masters man, he's a smarmy, greasy, lying tory cunt. a sort of rees-mogg of the football world. but then throughout the ashley era, with the notable exceptions of keegan, benitez and a few of the players, just about everyone employed by the club at high level and indeed those who've felt the need to get themselves directly involved are utter cunts. from the fat lad himself, through charnley, bishop, wise, llambias, jiminez, justin barnes, pardew, bruce, richard keys, rio ferdinand, tim sherwood, luke edwards, robbie fucking savage etc etc. it's like some kind of obscene, festering pile of human scum. you shouldn't even be able to make it up really.

I am genuinely shocked if I receive a call or text when I’m in the same place as the wife.

😂

Surprised there's nothing for Helen McCrory. RIP Polly.

Respect the gammon, Tom. It's what the Duke of Edinburgh would've supposedly not been bothered about but I suspect might've been on more than one occasion. Sorry, just morphed into Ryder-talk a quarter of the way into this.

Aye, we've got our little lad in 4 days a week and it's about £800. Genuinely can't wait for him to be at school, so I can spend the rest on grown up stuff like beer and comics.

I wonder if anyone was there to witness the “three bitings”? I put it to you there were no bitings, just a man and his determination to own a staffy....

Fucking hell. Between that and the dogs, I'm starting to understand how we can afford to rent in London

After launching a well timed imaginary #venture into #British #publishing he should look into setting up a company to sell beepers, maybe VCRs too. What a fucking nob he is, only a club as shite as the mackems could attract a bloke as delusional and trampy as that.

Lockdown stopped you meeting mates, not having mates.

I had the Astrazeneca one and didn't feel any side effects. Sounds like your mates/colleagues are all using 'side effects' as an excuse not to see you. Probably all out having pizzas.

And there's thebrokendoll we know and love

Whatever you want?