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We'd better re-sign Tony Green then, he'll have a good ten years left in his legs.

Aye, completely unforeseeable. Along with all the other things I detest this government for, cronyism is going to wreck this country. Johnson and Cummings have purged their party and civil service of anyone who tells uncomfortable truths, and replaced them with nodding yes men and stooges. Awarded contracts for millions, billions even, to incompetent arseholes like Dido Harding and whoever is mates with Grayling or Jenrick etc. I hope one day there is a reckoning but I'm not naive enough to believe it. I'm too busy battling personal issues, many caused by the government, to get involved in politics any more. Maybe that's the plan. Make life so hard, people will be subjugated just by the need to survive. Maybe there will be a tipping point but who wants it to come to that?

Sounds like the new Hugo Viana

That's not tapas from Britain, that's tapas from Iceland.

Ill take this, Sonatine

Or Blackstone decided it was attracting too much traffic to their website from people who will never give them any business

Cheers man We all obviously knew it was coming, but it’s still a kick in the nuts when it actually happens. Telling the kids was tough, but they took it well.

That Storey freak has done some completely unrevealing interviews for metro radio (metro radio ffs ). Caught a bit of one where he was banging on about how different he is from most football club owners. Apparently that’s because he’s doing it because he loves football although I couldn’t help thinking the main difference is other football club owners actually own football clubs

Major lads fan FTM

oh dear, ian.

Martin Gannon, Gateshead Council. Fills you with confidence in the government:

Agreed but honestly I think there is a strong chance things are going to get much, much worse as their corruption and incompetence catches up on then and really impacts people's lives. The propaganda machine will be in full spin blaming everyone else: the EU, Ireland, immigrants, libtard remoaners etc. But even Goebbles would struggle to fix this, you have to hope that finally the public will wake up..... No, I don't really think so either. Although the old are dying out and the new generation will never forgive these cunts, so maybe in decade or so.

The tories are ahead in the polls and would still have a majority if there were an election tomorrow. It would be much reduced but the fact about 42% would still vote for them makes me bereft of any hope of things getting better any time soon. I mean, it’s difficult to conceive a less competent cabinet and pm. Before you consider the levels of corruption and lies no one seems to give a fuck about. People are fucking stupid

Follow @comedydave for even more zingers

Matt Hancock telling people we can avoid a second wave if we do what we’re told, after a second wave became imminent due to people doing what they were told

I’ve spruced this bad boy up a bit and it’s been christened “”Pamela Anderson” by the “idiot alarm” * WhatsApp group as it’s “a fuckin old bike from the 1980s” * the current Mrs PL’s term for 10 or so fellow twats...

Needless to say, when one of his kids needed a test recently, they got one... Coronavirus: Rees-Mogg self-isolating after child tested https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-politics-54103002 Article doesn’t clarify if it was Perfidious or Manglesplatt who was infected but you get the idea...

I'm glad, if that's not a ridiculous word to use under the circumstances, that it was fairly quick as far as these things go. I imagine it's the way any of us would wish to go out. Raising a nightcap in his direction tonight (I won't tell him it's alcohol-free if you don't)

Dear MF I'm so sad to hear that your dad has passed away The bairns will be fine, because you are there for them take care mate

Sorry to hear it, MF.

*Kieron Dyer has entered the thread*

Condolences mate

I don't recommend the xanax build. I fell asleep everytime I tried to watch anything on it.

Everyone knows there’s no better way of prolonging a career in football than having years of different debilitating injuries. Presumably helped by all those great lifestyle choices he’s made

I'm surprised he get on metro radio, tbh. Thought the Tyne & Wear satellite TV channel might have been his only bet?

The UK is "now seeing a second wave" of Covid-19, Prime Minister Boris Johnson has said, adding "it's been inevitable we'd see it in this country".

Apparently he has scored 4 goals in his career

Listening to James O’Brein.... last time Sadiq Khan spoke to the PM: 10th May The first minister of Wales has had one brief phone call with the UK government since 28tn May We’re mostly alone. The gimps from the cabinet are on a PR campaign every morning and that’s about it....

They really have failed at every opportunity over this.

He's fine, he's 40 and skinny so he should be good.

Hope he’s ok, mate

you look different - did you change your hair?

Mrs Mays home office lives on...thriving...

Blackstone Chambers wouldn't let ashley in unless he changed his dan dare jeans, ashley said "no, fack you ! " It's all over

CT’s mushroom has just released spores.

@The Fish - so this is what it looks like

People believe that stuff too. They’re so used to provoked outrage after Brexit that they question nothing that’s put in front of them

What a horrible stuck up twat Rees-mogg is.

All in favour vote AYE

'ken oath. Mitch Starc's mum made a few birthday cakes for my kid's birthdays, and she's a champ. That's about my current interest in cricket wrapped up.

I feel like a proper dag.

£2 BLASTAWAYS IN CIRCUS CIRCUS!

just meet in the pub. or have a picnic on a train

Honestly if Gandalf the Tramp buys the mackems they’ll in league two before you can say “why’s that schoolgirl getting in that strangers Land Rover?”