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Set up chairman’s goldfish tank - tick

A minuet's silence?

Go t’shop, get tea - tick

He seems alright to me.

Corbyn doing an acceptance speech for a twitter poll on "the best PM we never had". That fucking bloke.

Wilson is living off a decent 4 month spell 2 years ago and apoears increasingly injury prone.Bournemouth fans aren't mourning his departure. He's still a better option than Joelinton, but that bar is fuckin subterranean

Nothing says ambition like plundering relegated clubs.

Hello fellow magpies, I've just created a new startup giving fans FREE football wallcharts. Website is www.wallcharts360.com or you can request a full quality version directly using this Request Form. There are 3 Newcastle designs as well as designs for all other 92 football league clubs. They are totally free, unless you want to make a voluntary donation of which 50% goes to the the partner charity Mind, a worthy cause I am sure you would agree. Cheers, Matthew

Happy Birthday Mate

Happy Birthday young ‘un.

Cheers Matthew

It's an irregular size (5ft 8" where a normal door is 6ft 6" 👍) so I've fabbed up a "farmhouse" style door from some 18mm pine tongue & groove flooring...

Don't know who's worse, him or his fan base\cult.

He should never have allowed the election to happen, deluded twat thought he could win it !!! and then not to work with the Lib Dems (wankers also) on a stop the tories/2nd referendum ticket, Irrespective of how rightly or wrongly he was maligned by the press, he was seen as utterly unelectable by loads of folks. He's utterly culpable for the shit we are in.

I'm far from wanting to see the back of Ritchie but if we got Wilson in as part of it and then got Frazer in on a free that would represent good business for a club as shit as us.

It’s like a spoons but not as cheap

We saw in Atlanta that it was the far right who started the damage and looting, that then led others to join in. I’d say there’s probably an element of that going on in other parts of the country in an attempt to delegitimise the protests.

If you want to avoid twatful behaviour, I would recommend not spending any time in pubs.

Was in the back of a taxi last night. Naturally the driver thought it was all a hoax.

Expert on pest behaviour. Go figure

Labour to blame for that I think you’ll find

I don't think the border in the Irish Sea is of great concern to anyone other than the Irish. Johnson always wanted to be PM, he just doesn't want to do the job. He's happy that his name will be listed there throughout history.

Fyp

I doubt he gives a fuck.

Johnson doesn't strategise, he blunders from one disaster to another on a daily basis. What was the point? Because he could.. Remember what a narcissistic cunt the man is. I hope his toxic legacy eats him every day of his life going forward.

I think the absence of scrutiny is an absolute disgrace. They do try in the usa on cnn and msnbc to critique trump but the likes of trevor noah and stephen colbert probably have more currency

I think no-one foresaw the replacement of the press by social media as many people’s main or only source of news. Since there is virtually no moderation of content, it’s a place where bullshit flourishes, and serves to reinforce prejudices, bigotry and false narratives. This means politicians can spout blatant lies and nonsense without fear of contradiction or consequences....any attempt to challenge or fact check is met with the “fake news” mantra and they refuse to be held to account. I’m not saying much of the press is anything but self interested scumbaggery but in the past there was at least an attempt in the broadsheets especially at factual and impartial reporting. That has now seems to have been overtaken by the constant diet of lies, smears and conspiracy theories that the gullible and stupid swallow as fact on social media. its no accident that enemies of democracy like Russia and China put so much effort into social media engineering. Its accelerated the descent of politics in the US and probably UK too into the sewer and allow the likes of Trump and Johnson to lie and lie again without fear of the consequences. Trump is different class though and I’ve no doubt he would rather burn America down than relinquish power and face justice for his crimes. Somewhere in the future I think the social media companies will have to take responsibility for the accuracy and impact of their content through regulation. Also not be allowed to rip off mainstream press content without paying for it. It’ll probably never happen in Murica though. Not sure what can be done about it ttt. Perhaps people below a certain IQ level should be prevented from accessing the internet altogether.

No doubt you’ll have seen Jordan Klepper’s interviews with Trump rally goers. These are literally the most stupid people on this planet, the people who swallow Trump’s bullshit by the bucketload and crawl over broken glass to vote for him. They are immune to facts and reality, their “opinion” is all that matters to them, and it’s usually pig shit ignorant and bigoted nonsense. If Trump wins we’ll be in the end times for America like you say, and possibly western civilisation as we know it. A man more obviously corrupt, narcissistic, nepotistic, mendacious and in the pocket of Russia is hard to imagine....and he will do literally anything to stay out of jail, where he belongs. His base are oblivious to it, probably because they can’t distinguish real life from reality TV, but the RNC have no such excuse and deserve political oblivion, which I hope they get.

Cummings seems more like the cling to power like a limpet type than the ride off into the sunset type. Johnson will do what he’s told to do by Cummings. Insofar as he’s able to anyway. I.e. it’s nee good telling him to deliver a coherent message via the medium of speech

The proposed and completed signings all look fucking terrible. Third choice keepers, midfielders Burnley don’t want, centre backs worse than our fifth choice, second strikers when we don’t have a number 9 worth the name and some left back back who would cost about the same as me. Last summer we smashed our transfer record (allegedly) as well as signing one of the brightest prospects in ligue 1 and we were still the worst team I saw all season, with the possible exception of Bournemouth when we played them down there. This is going to be a fucking slog and I really don’t know if I have the stomach for it any more.

He’s big, strong and quick. Not the best finisher. Ideal really cos we have too many lethal strikers as it is

The Knight: "Archra, err...Archo.....Artcraft, err....Lazaar! Alreet wor kid? You're looking in good shape, kidda! Think you've a a great chance of getting in the side next season, son. It's Lee, Lee Ryder by the way, top reporter on all things NUFC from the evening chronicle, you might've heard the other players mentioning me? Anyways, do you fancy a quick interview then mebbees meet up once a month for a chat?" Achraf Lazaar: "I'm really sorry, but Lee Marshall sorts out the interviews for players." The Knight: "Nee bother, young'un."

There’s a local journalist in Devon who wrote the line “Things came to a head” and sat back, cracked a can, and went…

The referee's a stunner! The referee's a stunner!

Reminds me of someone…

Doing it all wrong mate…

J69 has been riding hogs for years. he also likes motorbikes.

Fucking hell, check out the hairy bikers

Good luck trying, you filthy animal.

I misread the title as 'The UK's hardest midget'. Now that's a TV show on Channel 5 I'd watch.

I was at the Almasty taproom last night, and sneezed a couple of times. If looks could kill

Canny few stories about people having to isolate following positive cases from pubs and such. And yet I’ve dodged the bullet. What a disgrace. Once more, it’s one rule for the part-timers and another for the seasoned pros.