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Went camping in the lakes a few times when you used to be able to get the Wright brothers bus to Keswick from the gallowgate bus station. It used to stop at Alston for about 20-30 mins. One time me and me mate went for a swift pint and the driver was in there too

Back off Alex, he’s just living his best life. ( just typing that made my fucking teeth itch ).

Cheers lads. He’s 85, up til now fit as a fiddle, and he’s taking it like a champ. If my kids have even half as many good memories of me as I have of him, I’ll have done well.

Brexit.....?

it's fine as long as there are no children involved and it's the sort of weekend where you don't sleep much anyway. on our most recent, and probably final, family camping trip, my youngest, who was potty training at the time, decided to do a dirty protest and use her hands to smear it all over the inside of the tent, which we had borrowed.

Pecked to death by seagulls.

Hope you and Renton are doing well. Even if having to be honest and sincere in my concern is tearing me apart.

@Monkeys Fist sorry to hear about your dad, my old man did the same,lung cancer did for him at 83... popped his cloggs right in the middle of the last world cup the inconsiderate old scrote

Yeh we were thinking of taking a tent too.

I watched loads of age inappropriate stuff, usually on a Saturday night when I was being babysat by my grandparents whilst simultaneously passively smoking about 40 Capstan Full Strength. But the one that takes the biscuit is seeing Death Wish 2 aged about 7 in a video bar (remember them? ) in Benidorm. There’s a graphic gang rape scene about 5 minutes into it.

it's a fucking terrible buzzword, i give you that, and i apologise for using it. ok, guys?

Before all this I thought a staycation (which is a word I’m not a fan of, not least because we don’t use the word ‘vacation’ but anyway) was when you had some time off so did the things a tourist would do where you live, ie local museums, attractions whatever. Whereas the correct phrase for holidaying in the UK is holidaying in the UK. Is it just because a load of fuckwits who didn’t realise you could do that (not you, Gloom) instead of going to Magaluf have now discovered it’s possible? Or is it ‘instagram influencer’ speak? My reaction to it is something akin to HMHM and ‘guys’

Spent at least half a pint of jism on her. Fuck me, I've just had a nostalgia twitch.

Remember Viz's suicidal Sid? Always trying to top himself until the last frame, where he cheers up and realises life is worth living and promptly gets run over by a bus etc. That'll be me.

I bet you fuck that up too- when shit’s going pear-shaped you can’t catch a break. I really do know how you’re feeling- my old man told me in July he’s got stage 4 cancer in his lungs, brain, liver and stomach- he’s opted not to have treatment other than palliative care. It’s fucking desperate seeing him diminish day by day. Tits always help- always.… Here’s a proper handful

(ex) TA very much.

Threw contractors and newly self-employed under a bus. Also essential small businesses like the vet my lass works for doesn't get any nice reward for furloughing staff as others will as he didn't need to which seems unfair.

I spent a week 14 years ago at my Mam's bedside waiting for her to die and I've been a supporter of euthanasia since. Me and my sister made a pact that if one of us is ever in the same situation the other will digitas it.

Cheers PL. Sorry to hear that mate. It’s made me even more sure that elected euthanasia should be an end-of-life option available to people with terminal illness. We’ll not allow pets to suffer unnecessarily but can’t give the choice to our loved ones. Mental.

I used to use those buses too. Although they left from Marlborough crescent, not Gallowgate iirc. When I was 14 me and 3 friends walked most the lakes and camped for a.whole week. Cant see that happening now. Not sure I even had pubes. Also I had a really bad limp because I was recuperating from a bad break in my leg and I actually developed a stress fracture in my foot and got pneumonia after 3 days constant rain. Ahh, the good old days.

I’m not saying it was a perfect operation.

Sorry to hear about your dad as well, MF.

Well we’re take the dog, loads of cans and have a fire so we’ll be fine I imagine. Last time we went as a group we stayed in the grounds of Rydal Hall & it was spot on. I did end up needing a piss during the night and I was mortal, so couldn’t open the zip of the tent and had to piss in an empty pot noodle. That tent was borrowed too.

Cheers all. As my hangovers lifting my mood is improving. Need to get in contact with my sister's consultant as she doesn't always understand what's happening. Maybe its not as bad as I fear. Seriously though growing old is shit. People you love start dying. Keeping fit is hard. Your prostate grows so you need to get up to piss every night. If your lucky. if you're unlucky it gives you cancer. Work just gets even shitter. Coronavirus becomes dangerous. Libido disappears unless you're MF and anyway your female peers are old as well. Oh, and NUFC still never win anything. I'm off to top myself!

Chin up @Renton, sometimes you're ahead in life & sometimes you're not. It has ever been thus....

put them in front of the telly and treat yourself to some me time in the wank shed/bathroom.

I'm just waiting for a tweet from one of the prospective buyers finishing with an 'SMB' on it before they get my approval.

If the Chopra deal falls through I've heard Xisco and Nacho are in advanced stages with their latin themed proposal.

Pinocchios pronouns are now He/Haw He/Haw. I’ll get me coat.

Lockdown timing was spot on. Track and trace: world-beating. Sending Covid positive people to care homes - genius

My dad showed me Blazing Saddles at a much too early and it goes some way to explaining my racism

so, not much has changed since then

Sorry to hear that M.F. He must have nads of steel if he’s going without treatment.

I’ve just read this. Sorry to hear about your dad, mate.

Aye, they were old fashioned coaches without bogs. Including the stop it took about 4 hours (or felt like it). Nee idea why they went that route and stopped at Alston / Royston Vasey as no new passengers ever seemed to get on or off there (bar stretching their legs / joining the driver for a pint). Fucking mental that they got rid of the railway to Keswick (and almost all of the lakes) when you think about it.

What @Howmanheyman said

I haven't even watched the video, I'm pissing myself laughing at the 'Silvio Tattisconie' name.

Aye, he looks like kid playing dressy up at nursery or something

An empty pot noodle? If it isn't an empty 2 litre bottle then there's going to be a smelly puddle is all I'm saying.

how to make the death of your brother all about you, by the donald

Listen they’re tired of poor kids being smarter than rich kids and getting into Oxford and stuff. Its massively humiliating for them.

Mad how the algorithm seemed to push up grades in Latin & Classics mind

just back from a three week staycation tour of the country, taking in somerset, mid wales, northumberland and the peak district. managed to largely avoid the crowds. unlike a holiday to the med, we did something active with the children every day, which was good, instead of the usual lazing by a pool, which meant i didn't read a many novels as i might have on a typical summer holiday. i didn't drink any less though. liver needs a well-deserved holiday.

It’s because he’s too short for a mugshot

I see Steve Wraith is giving this one his approval. Makes it feel super genuine now that Steve is interested in it and they have two ex players that know absolutely fuck all about buying a club consulting on it. I look forward to Wraith putting up pictures of the Tyne bridge with the flag of whatever country the people involved originate from in the background, what a little fucking rat he is man.

I wouldn’t worry, I was about 7 when I first saw An American Werewolf in London and look how I turned out

I was at the Almasty taproom last night, and sneezed a couple of times. If looks could kill

You’ve got a girlfriend, we get it!

It's insane. He's stealing the election in plain sight and nobody is lifting a finger to stop him. You can see it now, a massively questionable outcome where he wins, the vote count is insanely low because none of the postal votes are getting counted, and everybody just gets told to move on. The time to go radge about this is now, not when he's been declared the winner.