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bruce's lads on a bit of a slump after previously steamrolling all and sundry put before them take on brendan rodgers whose team is making a decent fist of competing with man city to be best of the rest. looks like a banker away win? well not necessarily, local hero andy thanks to some longer screws in his ankle will win the most headers ever recorded in world football. by virtue of the 2,000,000 opportunities this will.afford £40m super striker joey linton, he'll score one, some how. 1-0 to the free ticket mags.

Happy New Year deserters!

hat doffed, you're doing a sterling job of winning new friends over on N.O.

Whoever manages to drag Brucey out of his crisp and lager coma in the bogs of The Diamond on New Year’s Morning, in time to wheelbarrow him in to the dugouts for the game, deserves a medal for enduring the fucking stench of stale beer and rancid vegetable farts he’ll be giving off. I expect his formation of Carroll in goal “c…cc…bleuurgh…cccoz he’s the biggest cunt on the pitch…” and Joelinton partnering Manquilo upfront “ Ha!… fuggen have that ya Spanish Peter Kay bassah!”, to pay dividends, but the best partnership will be between the kitman and physio to change his keks before anyone notices he’s shit his pants for the third time in the match. Leicester might just edge this.

Brown sauce, if only NUFC was that exciting, lightly salted don't you mean?

Happy new year for later on. Expect the new year to be roughly the same shit if not worse!

"Tha needs t'routine love. Tha can't just go about tha life wi' no structure, that way t'madness lies!"

Happy 2020 everybody! We’re first cab off the rank in NZ. Hope you and yours have a happy and healthy new year and new decade.

Anybody not waiting for ages for a Chinese takeaway tonight? Happy New Year lads.

Even the kids on N.O can smell a rat.

We do a potential Noncery List alongside our Stiff Stakes every year and I would like to inform you all that Elton John is going on the former. Based purely on PLs taxi-based, second-hand investigative work.

The rise in anti-homeless infrastructure is a fucking disgrace. Under bridges ffs. They’re doing no harm to anyone there.

Of course I accept that some are criminals, some are hopeless drug addicts, and some may just not want the type of help the state gives (if in practice it gives any help). My point was that I've observed more people seem desperate but have no pathway to get out of their situation. Maybe my perception is wrong but I doubt it. The Guardian has done quite a lot about this. It's a solvable problem though, with adequate resourcing. Finland get the homeless housed without any preconditions. Means people can be homed first and then get their problems sorted. Seems like common sense to me and it apparently works.

Chebs

Sadly, not. But you could always rewatch wild at heart to inspect Dern’s fine pair in her prime

The stench is from his rancid patter