Leaderboard

Eats Catts for me like

But you got that lift fixed?

They’re going through the “anger” and “denial” stage just now, give them time, 6 months or so, and they’ll be claiming Rafa as a MLF.

Benitez still has them rattled 6 months after his departure. What a bloke

‘I’ve got a packet of Tudor Gammon and Pineapple with your name on it, son’

Aye same as quiff. A few years ago, despite my dislike for them, I wouldn’t have wished it on them, but they have been so fucking rancid and obsessive towards us in recent years I’m happy to see them gone. The final killer blow will be their kids and grandkids asking for the toon game to be put on tv, so they can watch, not in the hope of us losing but, because they have become.... little maggy cunts.

“We” 😂😂😂

The only injection you need to worry about is the beef one that your lass is getting behind your back.

"Injection"

Ole's at the wheel

Found propped up in the corner after rigor mortis has set in - I'm Still Standing

Capital punishment in an Arab state for being a homosexual - rockhit man

When Mike finally gets the hang of this football lark we'll really take off.

As eternally amusing as that bushpig is, this walking advert for bad barbering and dentistry is even better https://youtu.be/rBSCfmbVDYY Bushpig is at 30s in. This absolute pearler is from 34s on “ You worried?” ” Not werried at all, tharrin a diffrunt leygue. If we were playing Rotherham and Burton Albion weeyk in an weeyk out wey’d be top of the Leygue anarl!”

So, since the season of goodwill is upon us, ( and I’ve partaken of several Christmas spirits ), a question arises in my mind about our sister-fucking neighbours. But first some preamble.… Our long rivalry has brought both pain and pleasure, in our case the latter mostly edging it, with us historically beating the fuck out of them on everything that counts. They love to bleat on about the last few derby results, but they were very much Pyrrhic victories for them- it seemed that they threw everything at them to the ultimate detriment of their club as a whole. ( And it most definitely is a hole). For the last 20+ years, they’ve royally stunk out whichever league they’ve infected, with their rancid fan’s behaviour and their laughably needy desperation to be loved by every and any club that isn’t us. The nadir of this awfulness was their morally bankrupt support, from the highest to lowest level of their club, of their beloved player, convicted paedophile Adam Johnson. It’s been an absolute joy to watch them plummet through the leagues, dragging poor Burton Albion with them, and a constant source of delight to witness the filthy pack of cunts have their hopes momentarily raised, just to see them crash and burn faster and more spectactularly than the Challenger shuttle. Whenever our despised owner has given them fuel to cackle like senile old women at our own club’s woes, their various owners over the years have always, without fail, managed to fuck things up on a far more hilarious scale than anything the Fat Cunt has managed. And so… the question. Would you rather see them continue on their monumental spiral down to oblivion, knowing it ultimately means no more derbys, but brings the massively entertaining money-shot of seeing them crash out of existence/the Football League, or would you rather see them level out where they are, permanently in the twilight zone, but with the odd chance of meeting them in the cups?

The Don

If I see a TV camera I head away from it. I'm no Steve Wraith or True Geordie.

He's the gadgie that walked into Rosie's and showed up the mags. True story.

Executed by electric chair - Something About The Way You Shook Tonight

They do say history is written by the winners....but any “definitive” political history of the second decade of the second millennium in what will then be termed the rather ironic “United Kingdom”will always be slanted by the authors own political bias. To me the big question won’t be why did leave win the referendum but why we had the referendum in the first place... Laura K is likely to be seen as a product of her times...a simpleton being manipulated by unelected goons who know a useful idiot when they see one..

A cock that small wouldn't obstruct a mouth that big

You can just picture him and Brewce, absolutely spackered on Fosters, collapsed in the back alley of the Sgt.Peppers, covered in empty packets of pork scratchings and scampi fries. “ Aah… aah fucken…ah fucken love you mind, Steven” ” Ahh, ch…cheers Lee.… (burp)… giz that last bag o’ Seabrooks man…”

I like that they are so tone deaf through their obsession that they don’t see how fucking weird calling us being 9th in the PL glorious is. Aye, you’s definitely have the high ground lads

The deluded jawdees who demand to win the European Cup every week were happy with a massively overrated manager who was underachieving. Or something like that I think

I remember her too. Definitely fancied her as well 😂

https://youtu.be/aQqC6_6Wf0M

The fucking state of that club and they're clinging like a drowning man to anything NUFC/Rafa related? Look a bit closer to home, lads. Shit got very real a while ago and I'd be a bit more worried about having a club to support in a few years.

It is, I was thinking of another lass, used to be an athlete- Kathy Tayler.

This ought not to be a problem

Man Utd fucking superb

Dies in a house fire- Candle in the Window.

Hazel O’Connor was shite.

Reminds me of..... https://youtu.be/3L2JZGpfszc

If he gets knocked over by a car, I'm releasing a cover of his Christmas classic but renaming it to "Step into Traffic"

Bloke next to me was crying when it went in. It brought a tear to my hungover eye this morning, I admit but I soon opened Safari and cracked one off.

Only Mike Ashley, football genius, could spend £40m on an inferior Joselu. Also, imagine how much better that side would be with Rondon instead

I like the idea that in their head, when you get relegated, you just play Rotherham and Burton 23 times each.

We’ll always have the clip of fat lass going “weeeyuh in the premieeer leeeague not the championship” with her club tie on though.

Evil genius. However, that does then deny our own future generations of the sheer delight and delicious hatred of them that we’ve so thoroughly enjoyed. Also, seeing them exist in a state of permanent misery as they yo-yo between League 1 and 2, making new alliances with Forest Green Rovers and Salford City , seems a far greater, and longer lasting pleasure, than the short lived but undoubtedly hilarious fact of them ceasing to exist would bring?

Tbf I bet there's a few of them considering turncoating anyway now that Ashley is dishing free tickets out

https://www.chroniclelive.co.uk/sport/football/football-news/newcastle-united-notes-steve-bruces-17460182 Got to admire the boldness of the daft cunt. A couple of months ago the press are getting pelters for being in bed with the club and for failing to adequately hold Bruce to account for stuff. A few wins later and he's posted an entire article about Brucey getting the beers in.

They’re in the bottom half of league one Are they still everyone’s “cup final” or just another league one team?

Your first humbucker guitar? Wow. They’re great pieces of kit though. I love my epiphone SG! meanwhile, played a mint gig last night

It was one of the lads from RTG. He walked in the bar alone and announced to a bar full of mags what he was going to do and would anyone care to stop him? All the mags shit themselves and looked at the floor while he went in and wrote it. He then went to walk out but picked up someone's pint, necked it then said, 'Mags? Mugs more like' before leaving the building.

Late entry for the post of the year award

Blue Eyes, Shirley.