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Bloke walks in to a bakery with a salmon under his arm, ” Do you do fish cakes?” ” No, sorry, we don’t ” says the baker. “ Shame.…” says the bloke, pointing at the Salmon. “It’s his birthday”.

Denis Norden has passed, he died suddenly in the morning as he was alright on the night.

Because he has not been fit enough and then away for international football. I expect to see him start this week, though.

Macron: "Brexit is the choice of the British people... pushed by those who predicted easy solutions... Those people are liars. They left the next day so they didn’t have to manage it."

I fucking hated Pardew but even he was never the real problem at the club. Now we've got one of the best managers in the world plying his trade with even fewer resources and some people still blame him. Not much on here but on social media in general. It's mental.

Agree with what RobinRobin said, Fernandez and Schar have had a decent amount of appearances between them. One of the key reasons is because Shelvey, ridiculously still one of the very few true creative players we have, has been injured and another being basically all of our games have been against top 6 sides. Let’s hoy all that out the window and blame Rafa eh? I’m not saying Rafa is above criticism but the players named aren’t much ahead of the ones that have started, other than Rondon who as Robin mentioned has been unfit and away on international duty for a decent amount of the games. If we had a fully fit Lascelles and Shelvey for all of the fixtures we’d likely have more points than we have now, we’d also have more points if the fat waste of space we have as an owner had allowed Rafa to get his first choices in the door rather than looking further down his list.

Joselu caught Rafa banging Sticky Vicky on a lads tour of Beindorm and has photo proof, thats all.

Sane guy goes into the bakers again and starts perusing what's on offer under the glass... Sees something he likes so asked the lass "Is that a doughnut or a meringue?" "No, you're right, it's a doughnut"

Scottish guy goes into a cake shop Lass serving says all cakes are £1 Guy says 'Ill have that one' 'Thats £2' '£2? Why?' 'Thats Madeira Cake'