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Errmmm...

I’m just picturing CT, having read this and impulse bought a pair of magnetic sandals, then digging up an entire field on his next metecting trip.

Would have to be an audacious move to make 5 subs.

Ofdonald

If I was there, I'd be entering the 3-legged race by myself.

Not in the videos I watch.

Ah shit, I didn't know you were a lesbian.

Seen a lot of big life changes in the past 2yrs and haven't been looking after myself properly. Work noticed a few tells and my manager had a quick chat to see if everything was ok, which prompted me to reach out. So just had the results of my mental health assessment back. Moderate to severe depression, severe anxiety (which is what I was expecting), but now "symptoms of Obsessive Compulsive Disorder" which a new twist Don't get BUPA through work until December and so I'm on the waiting list with the NHS. So basically lads, if I start turning the website on and off exactly 12 times, don't fret it's all good

Should definitely be a lesbian tailors called "Her suit".

Really? Most Leavers seemed to believe that we'd still have full access to the SM.

I didn’t realise my distaste for velcro jesus sandals would cause such a furore. At least you didn’t wear socks with them

I knew that lisping nursery teacher was a bad influence.

Cheers and merry birthday to you too my simian chum

Larger turnout than his inauguration by the looks of it

I came first in the sack race.

The thing with this bollocks from Trump on trade - he's complaining the US gets a bad deal from the EU. Which means by extension the EU must get a 'good' deal on trade. So we're swapping trading relationship which favours us, for one that won't, as far as the US is concerned. It's fucking ludicrous.

At Sports Day where all the fit Mams are in their sports gear.

Cunt.

They said cake and the fat cunt believed them. CT in 9 words. Can anyone better this?

Aye, they’ll let any old cunt get access if they’re not a member

We marked it by having a couple of mates round, eating mexican and having a couple of beers What a Thursday that was

Can we get him on a share arrangement for home games only?

Come on CT, you have to own that one. Confirms everything we already knew as well about the shifting goalpost mentality of Leave voters.

Good luck with your various issues, benders. I was diagnosed with acute sexiness last year. I've taken it in my stride.

I wish he'd cut his own throat.

"Cameron should be shot for having no plan". And what about the fuckwits that voted leave with no concept of what it would look like beyond the lies of Johnson and Gove. You don't vote for it and then say "Ok now show us your plan....what do you mean there isn't one?" Cunt.

Tbf, when you just type the first thing that comes into your head purely to try and get a reaction it must be difficult to keep track of all times you’ve contradicted yourself

Back of the net

The only magnetic clasp I have is the one that secures my dream journal shut

I have less body hair than a lesbian these days

I bought some birkenstocks, only 33 and the comfiest footwear I own.

It was part of the solutioning we blue skyed in our face to face, something to action moving forward.

Wouldn't worry, he's the type to wear white socks and sandals.

Sandals FFS. No one wants to see your disgusting taloned toes, @Renton

I’m now in full Dad Grunt mode, any movements up, down or sideways produce an involuntary “ hrnggh”

The joint press conference should be entertaining. Time for May’s Love Actually moment.

Can’t believe you left the promising bit.

I could swear at 1:16 it says 'my daddy tried to bone her in the summer'.

Deffo been worse so far. Won’t really hit till I get home. On my last bag of fluids now. Should be done by 5ish. Got two 1 hour outpatient treatments left, then a 6 week wait for a scan to see if it’s worked. Basically will have had the whole summer off work and been too rough to go anywhere or do owt, bad timing.

I bet CT's lot are known as "The Clampetts" by everyone on the estate. "I see the Clampetts have got themselves a hot tub." "Have they?! That fat, classless cunt is a nightmare." "Ah I can't stand him." "Aye he's a proper wanker. I wish he'd just fuck off and die." That sort of thing.

TBF, I think England should have stood up and demanded they be put in a harder group. If you can't understand the larger effects of getting to a World Cup semi-final with a promising young squad who all play for each other, all work hard and all represent what a modern England should look like, then the world has officially passed you by.

We do have our own bunch of xenophobic taxi drivers unfortunately. as much as the system does get exploited by a lot of migrants every person fleeing for legit reasons is worth the moral high ground.

It’s my 50th birthday treat mate, I’m aiming to eat as many different dead animals as I can in a two day period